Lately I'm trying to love myself more. I've been doing things like sleeping, yoga, eating lots of vegetables, taking medication, no alchohol, and volunteering when I can find the time. It is helping. This specific combination of things is going well so far and I hope that even as my life changes I can keep finding things that work. I had such bad mood swings in the fall that it almost killed me. I've also tried to stop looking for other peoples validation to fill my lack of self-love. I think mostly though, it is the medication that has helped. I tried a bazillion things before and they didn't work. Trauma really fucked me up and I could never get my brain back to normal. The small amount of research on the long term affects of anti depressents freak me out though.