Masturbating to my ex

I've been with my partner for four years and I love him dearly, but lately he hasn't been able to last longer than 10min. Once he finishes he automatically has no desire to do anything else other than be on his phone/Instagram. I've been fantasying about my ex and our sex life for the last few months and I'm really contemplating on opening up the relationship.

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do it

Jul 22, 2019 at 1:43pm

Life is an experiment. Make experiments.

The risk of pissing off your partner is high, and if you have kids or have other reasons to prioritize the relationship over satisfaction, then be very careful.

But we only have one life, and research indicates that we regret not travelling more, having more fun, being better parents...we regret NOT DOING.

So IDK how mature your partner is or you are and if this is a good idea for you, but don't dismiss it

girl

Jul 22, 2019 at 3:39pm

just leave him

Anonymous

Jul 22, 2019 at 5:46pm

If he doesn't reciprocate don't have sex with him. Period. He sounds like a fucking slob.

Why the downvotes?

Jul 23, 2019 at 12:11am

I'm in a committed relationship and I think about my exes to help get me off sometimes. It's my secret. This is "confessions" after all.

Anonymous

Jul 23, 2019 at 4:49am

Don't settle for shitty selfish sex. Get yours.

how is

Jul 23, 2019 at 12:33pm

not being able to last 10 minutes equating to a slob? Do you even know what words mean?
If a woman dried up before 10 minutes, is she a slob too?

What

Jul 24, 2019 at 6:26am

I wouldn't give for a 10 minute ride!
Count yourself lucky it lasts almost 10 minutes.

How old is he?

Jul 25, 2019 at 2:23pm

If he has impotency problems then that is one issue, but if he's selfish and lazy that is another issue. You said he's on his Instagram--sounds like he's younger than say 50. Does he use drugs or drink too much? Or is he seeing someone else. Regardless, jumping onto your phone after quick sex and not reciprocating is definitely symptomatic of some other issue. But if he is just a dick--then DTMFA. Nobody has time for a selfish lover.

18 9Rating: +9

Anonymous

Jul 27, 2019 at 5:08pm

Remind him he’s got hands, a mouth and there are many items available for him to use to reciprocate the feelings once his own tool has been spent- might he be inexperienced, insecure or anything like that? . If he doesn’t find your sexual experience important but gets his then I don’t know what to say, I mean you can work around not being able to last forever but if he’s selfish he’s selfish.

11 9Rating: +2

Anonymous

Jul 29, 2019 at 1:21pm

Have you talked about it?
If it is a sexual dysfunction, it becomes a relationship issue since both can work at it to improve the sex life. Maybe let him go down on your longer or tease him rather than just penetration. If you share responsibilities; kids, mortgage etc, I would consider a relationship therapist.
If you're in your twenties and are in the relationship because it's comfortable and convenient then I think you should break up and travel and focus on yourself for a while .

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