Say what?

To want to withdraw and reflect. Often people will understand if you need space, as long as you voice this as a need. With others, setting firm boundaries is good practice. Easier said than done, but your well-being is important and you have to look out for number one.

I don’t know what your work/social situation is, but could you plan some quiet solitude time for the BC Day long weekend to at least give you some temporary relief to look forward to?

I hope you find the peace you are seeking. Good luck!

... been alone since I was disabled 10 years ago. The only interaction I get is buying groceries, and even there, the cashiers will make small talk with some people, not with me. They basically grunt at me. Good times.

Lately my heart has started pounding in my chest a bit, I am hoping that means the end is near.

Keep your own shoes on.
Cause personally I dont think its wise to trade shoes.. Foot odor and you may have some foot fungus going on..
Try heading for the mountains.
Maybe some camping will get you that quiet time you so desperately want.