From France to Vancouver

I moved to Vancouver over a year ago for work as there are more opportunities in Canada for a young working profession. I did not understand the dating culture here. My friends at work have a list of probably 20 items for a man. I keep on telling them that no man can meet that criteria and you must love with your heart and not your eyes. I do not understand why a mans job is so important and is often number one on the list. I could marry a baker or even a grocer if he loved me with all his being. You must love with your heart and not your eyes and no list can ever compare to this.


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"Even a grocer"???

Sep 1, 2019 at 9:49am


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Sep 1, 2019 at 9:55am

This sounds like it's written by a man harping on this issue.

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Old skool

Sep 1, 2019 at 12:48pm

Thank you.
Just for being. Not only abstract appreciation, though it is that, too.
Experience is a cruel teacher. Over the years, it's taught me that differences in values and culture are not possible for me to overcome. If it wasn't for Europeans, and particularly women, I'd be forever alone. Even when in a relationship, this has happened to me many times here.
The Old World has culture, and North America has none.
Originally from Eastern Europe, myself. The values here are very different from mine, exactly like you said. I have more in common with someone recently from Mexico, than with most of the people here or in the US (these last two are not much different, really). And I'm not even religious.
Been here for decades, and still I feel more at home in Latin America (for example). Leaving soon, hopefully.
Good luck. Hope it works out for you.

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Vancouver but not London?

Sep 1, 2019 at 1:28pm

Everything in Vancouver has become so contrived even dating. Life in the Potemkin village where appearances are everything.

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Sep 1, 2019 at 1:50pm

Couldn't give a sh@t what a guy did for a living... I would be more interested if he liked what he did.
Physical attraction is important, but it's the connection mentality and emotionally that take that attraction to a whole new level.

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Sep 1, 2019 at 1:55pm

I never had trouble dating or making friends. Your know-it-all, patronizing advice is nothing more than an attempt to perpetuate the stereotype that Vancouver women are too picky and should lower their standards. I don't know anyone who has a 20-item list of attributes for choosing a partner. But your advice is terrible. "Love with your heart," whatever that means will not be enough. You can try to love as much as you can someone who has an addiction or is violent/abusive, you will never be happy. You should choose your partner with your heart and your head (not the one in your pants, guys).

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Sep 1, 2019 at 2:06pm

Same,moved here from central Europe and it is puzzling. The men seem to ignore women. I have said hello to many, and the usual response is that they look confused. They've told me that they have never had a woman say hi to them over their entire lives.
They seem afraid, or not knowing how to react. What has been done to them?
But I have read this a lot, and I am sure that women will comment on here and accuse you of being a man.

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And people wonder

Sep 1, 2019 at 3:27pm

Why men look for young and skinny girls in return(:

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Sep 1, 2019 at 5:33pm

... women tend to think love means this sort of resigned submission, not anything passionate.

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Sep 1, 2019 at 7:03pm

love doesn't pay my bill's.

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