I was too young to marry

I was 23 and she was 33. She was a widow of only a year with two little kids, I only wanted to be friends at first....we both had traumas. I helped her around her house, we hung out for supper, I was way immature but I had a frigging amazing job that paid a lot! I think she saw security in me for her kids, and an opportunity for herself to breath a little without financial concern. We did start dating, but honestly I didnt want the package, I just wanted a friend to talk with and share common healing from trauma....but she wanted marriage and security. I totally buckled to the pressure and we got married. We fought a lot up to the wedding, but so much had been put into it, I think we both felt too much pressure to keep it going. I knew it was wrong to get married to her from the very beginning. She was way too messed up from the death of her first spouse....I was too young and too messed up from my own trauma. Many years later, after many bad fights, lots of her bad drug usage, police calls, her hitting me many times, I finally had the courage (yes courage) to tell her I was not in love with her and I wanted a divorce. The divorce has been total hell, her kids hate me, her family hates me, I am a devil reincarnate, and her dead husband is the hero...he was there for 2 years of the oldest life, I was there for 16. I feel it was a total waste of time for me, that we all would be better off if I had more courage when I was only 23....now Ive raised two kids that dont want anything to do with me, I pay 2600 a month in child support and Im on the hook for their university. But since Im not the biological or adoptive parent I have no rights. I really hope that I can recover emotionally from this, I really hope they can too. Jeez this feels good to get off my chest

23 Comments

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Good luck amigo

Sep 18, 2019 at 6:39pm

You are a good man no matter what.

Wow...

Sep 18, 2019 at 7:01pm

Just..wow. Forty years old,and done nothing for yourself.

Why..... just...why?

Hmm

Sep 18, 2019 at 7:16pm

Doesn't child support end at 18? Why are you on the hook for their university? I paid for my own education. Maybe grow some balls, instead of playing a victim all your life.

Anonymous

Sep 18, 2019 at 7:54pm

Thank you for stepping up and being a father. That is more than any money can buy.
Those kids will change with time.. They may hate you now but wait until their 23. You could be a lightworker look it up ! God bless and chin up. You make the world a better place

You should move

Sep 18, 2019 at 7:57pm

Go somewhere they can’t find you the kids are not yours so why the heck should you have to pay for them fuck that hit the road and don’t look back!!!

You Poor Man.

Sep 18, 2019 at 8:51pm

You poor man, you were duped into looking after her and her kids. Scientist Richard Dawkins in his book The Selfish Gene said a single mother is capable of 'tricking' a man into looking after her and her children into caring for them. You said it when you said she was seeking security. A woman is only looking out for her offspring at any cost. In theory, parenthood isn't sacrifice but selfishness. All parents are doing what they can to propagate their gene pool. She took advantage of your youthful naive nature, loneliness and emotional baggage. You've been f#%ked and not in the literal sense.

Redacted

Sep 18, 2019 at 9:00pm

Yes, leaving takes courage, don't let anyone tell you otherwise. You will recover, in time. The hardest part is behind you.

44 9Rating: +35

Wow, well written horror story dude

Sep 18, 2019 at 9:50pm

And a lesson for everyone.
If you don't get the lesson folks, you ain't reading.
Well done!

Unbelievable!

Sep 18, 2019 at 10:13pm

You played her? You wasted both her time and yours.

Anonymous

Sep 19, 2019 at 4:18am

Said every divorced man ever who has to support children.

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