Quarter life crisis

I'm confessing that my life is mess. I didn't go to school for the longest time being afraid to get out there. I eventually went to school and fell in love with a career I can't have because of my epilepsy. Now I have debt and I don't know what else I want to do. Guys aren't attracted to me, I'm broke living at home at 26 and my mental health is declining as I write this. I'm just so broken down. The worst part is, I turn to food to comfort myself through all of this.

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Speaking of turning to food for comfort

Sep 13, 2019 at 2:19pm

I (& many other others) can totally relate, but I would advise avoiding sugary foods (that included flour-made stuff) because that is what really will contribute to weight gain.

For your mental health find a caring counsellor.

Choices

Sep 13, 2019 at 4:03pm

Considering everything you wrote, I relate to going to school for a career I cant have, in debt, at home. Start making little changes. Experience different jobs, save a little more, and change your perspective to living at home as a blessing. Lucky to have that in order to work on ourselves. I know it's easier said than done but if you feel you're down and out, you can really only go up from here, it just starts with the choices you make now and how bad you want things to be different.

Yes

Sep 13, 2019 at 4:16pm

Many many many can relate. I just finished a chocolate bar. the first poster is giving you advise you already know.

Hang in there...

Sep 13, 2019 at 5:49pm

You're not alone; you can bounce back from this. I'm sure you have an incredible amount of gifts to offer that the world is waiting to receive; it's baby steps to get through the mud puddle, but trust you will come out the other side.

Peggy

Sep 14, 2019 at 8:21am

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start all over again.

This will mean nothing for 20 years but...

Sep 14, 2019 at 10:25am

YOUR 25!!!! You are all good right now! Get your" bucket list" in, travel, see the world while you still can.

Anonymous

Sep 15, 2019 at 12:25pm

I was at the height of my career. When i got into a domestic violence fight and ended up charged with 7 things. I lost my job. My record said hello and goodbye to nursing school. I had to go back to waitressing. A few months pass my charges are dropped and my ex i have not sewn since thank god. I never knew i was in an abusive relationship. I had my name on nothing not the cars the house we rented. I ended up kicked out and went to a womans fucking shelter! I go back to my job i work a year and a half and my mental health has me off the job. Right when im making bank ive paid off my 10k student loan. Im put on disability by my employer.
Look at your situation and be grateful. Every action has a consequence. Its time to look at your life as a journey and rethink where you are. If you think your ugly thats your problem but i bet you arent. Take some antidepressants. And get back out there baby!!

Reflection

Sep 15, 2019 at 2:39pm

"avoiding sugary foods (that included flour-made stuff) because that is what really will contribute to weight gain."

nope! consuming more energy than you need to maintain contributes to weight (fat) gain. it doesn't matter if the energy is from protein, fat, or carbs. nor does it matter what time it is nor feeding frequency ("meal"). your body will use everything.

satiety is a different thing. perhaps you meant to refer to that.

little changes and self care

Sep 18, 2019 at 10:32am

You are not alone! It is nice at least that you have a family to support you- if I was in your financial position, I would be homeless. Not that it makes it any better, just that sometimes shifting perspective to finding things to be grateful for can help.
For me, I find a little self-care goes a long way. Buying less food, but higher quality (eg. 1 fair & organic chocolate bar instead of 5 crappy chocolate bars, so I can still comfort eat, just better and a bit less), even as little as turning my clothes the right way from inside out when I take them off the drying rack, to make life easier for future me.
Maybe since you aren't in school anymore, try learning something just for fun. Go to a second hand book store and pick up books that interest you. Or learn an instrument (salvation army thrift store, youtube tutorials and other online resources, mean that it doesnt have to break the bank.) or sign up for Duolingo and learn a language. Maybe even take up a sport. You could join a vancouver activity group on facebook and join in for hikes for free. Getting out in nature and making friends can be good for mental health. There are even people who meet Saturdays at Grandview Park to play unicycle hockey. They are friendly and I think they even have spare unicycles and will teach you for free. (i dont know what considerations you would need to take with regards to your epilepsy, but i am sure if the people you were with understood the situation and perhaps for some sports you would need a helmet, but if you want to there could be a way) So anyhow, there are a lot of ways to get out there, learn something new, meet people, etc... without breaking the bank. And once you discover other interests you have and surround yourself with like minded people, I am sure you will find a new career path that will be fulfilling, and someone to love, and most importantly, your self-esteem.
Lastly, do not be discouraged how long the wait is for therapy. Apply NOW, so that a year from now rather than being discouraged by the year long wait, you are getting started. ;) Good luck!

Start small

Sep 20, 2019 at 9:23pm

Take small steps at a time to help Build positivity in your life. Try Art, travel, books, eating healthy, exercise, yoga, courses, mindfulness . It’s a journey, focus on the small victories. High quality organic food and reducing sugar will help with overeating, but be gentle with yourself. It takes time.

Don’t compare yourself to others. Use this as a time to learn about yourself. It’s your opportunity to learn and grow.

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