Peoples Confessions

There are some confessions on this page that are gut wrenching. The pain people endure is amazing. I have great sympathy for them while i'm reading them. On another hand though, I can't help but think that we each choose our lives. Yes, we all suffer to some degree in our lives and that suffering can cause life long drama, yes, yes. BUT we ALL get to choose what we do, and how we live our lives. It's no one else fault if you do not have zen. I woke up early Saturday. lay in bed day dreaming for a few hours about life, my past/furture etc. and now I'm here quietly drinking a coffee in peace. Because I choose to have this lifestyle I'm more content than I think I've ever been. But I choose it, by not having crazy people in my life. Choosing to spend more time on/with myself more than anyone else. You can do it to, you just have to want it.


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A bit shortsighted

Nov 10, 2019 at 9:04am

I think you have some good points there, but in some ways your thinking is a bit shortsighted.

Not everyone has the ability, freedom, or power to make choices in their lives. Some people are dependent on others: adults and children in abusive homes may not be able to leave, physically, financially, or otherwise; people who are born with or develop mental and/or physical health issues have no choice when their issues are genetic; everyone - and I do mean everyone - lives out patterns that were imprinted on them at a young age; some people truly can't break out of a situation without help, and sometimes that help isn't available; and some people simply aren't aware that their situations are unhealthy, because it's their normal and they don't know anything else. I'm sure there are many, many more examples.

I think it's wonderful that you have the luxury of sitting in bed on your own for a few hours, daydreaming and reflecting about how your choices have created this privilege. I say this without sarcasm or bitterness. Not everyone has that luxury. But I think there's a hint of victim-blaming in your perspective that you aren't quite seeing.

I would love to choose to live according to what I want in life. If I had complete control over my life, I'd be financially independent, have a happy network of friends and family, have a loving and stable relationship, and never have any pain in my life again. That's what I would choose. But life doesn't work that way. We don't have complete control over our lives. We don't get to choose everything so that life is to our liking; often, choices are made for us by other people - people making their own choices that are in conflict with our own.

I agree that we can sometimes choose our situations in life and can sometimes choose who is in it and who isn't. But to imply that some people are choosing painful, unhappy lives is naive. I think few people would choose a life a pain if they could avoid it.

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Missing the point

Nov 10, 2019 at 2:15pm

Of confessions. This is where we purge the tough parts, like unclogging a spigot.

Many of us use this place as a way of confessing away the things we are currently letting go of.

Some of my confessions may come across as holding on, but in reality, they're the letting go.

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Nov 10, 2019 at 7:43pm

"we each choose our lives."

"I choose it, by not having crazy people in my life"

Yeah, I hear you, in a sense you're right. I have a mother with disabilities, my dad left when I was 5. If I hadn't stayed at home, she would've died back in the 2000s from diabetic complications. I was taking her to the hospital every few months for sepsis, she was on the way out. And "thankfully" I said "mom, you have the money, go to a private doc," one of those private clinics the socialist canadians want to shut down. The private doc did a very basic battery of tests: her iron was essentially zero, she was anemic, a third world disease. Her MSP doc had just giggled at her as she lost her hair and got obese, "oh sweetie, just eat less cake." She laid out a cool $1000 and got real medicine. So, she got on te iron, and she's stil fucked from years of abuse by the incompetent MSP doc, but she's at least not in the hospital for sepsis every few months.

And if I talk to her about malpractice against her MSP doc, she acts like I'm crazy. She literally got sicker and sicker and sicker for years while this MSP hack banked thousands of dollars off of her. That's medicine? She was anemic, the MSP doc never bothered to run the test, even after she had symptoms of anemia like weight gain, lethargy, hair loss.

The point I'm making is that while people like you may be able to insulate yourself from this sort of thing, the problems are systemic. I didn't "chose" to be born in a country with a failed healthcare system that allows "doctors" to take advantage of women who weren't trained in school to eat properly, take care of themselves, etc.

So, could I abandon her, and my father, a whole other can of worms? Physically, sure. But I'd just be making them someone else's problem, shirking my natural duty.

And when we have lots of shirkers, it means normal humans like me end up carrying a lot of the weight...socially, judicially, etc.

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