Always second guessing

I confess that no matter how much my instinct tells me that this decision is the right one, I always end up second guessing myself. I drive myself crazy analyzing every part of it. Going over and over the what-ifs. I realize that I’ve become so used to not trusting myself after too many years of chaos resulting from trusting the wrong people. If I hadn’t made that decision to trust them, things would have likely been so different (and better), so how can I trust myself to make the right decision now? I find myself paralyzed by indecision far too often and its really had devastating effect on my life.

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Hey OP..

Jan 24, 2020 at 9:11am

This is me too!!!! It's horrible isn't it? I wonder how many other feel this way?

Keep it simple

Jan 24, 2020 at 10:03am

Make decisions that prioritize your own long-term health, safety, well-being and happiness.

This will allow you to care properly for yourself, which will open up all kinds of opportunities in the future.

It sucks kid

Jan 24, 2020 at 11:27am

I get it, the never really knowing, the always on gate fretting an..... wait hold on not true. I just remember an old trick Pa taught me. He said Forrest you have a good heart and gift like that God gave people the ability to tell when others are lying. Like almost nearly instantaneously and almost to a certainty. Mmm.. I wonder young grasshopper is your heart pure, cause if it is you merely need sit them down and say.... Yo fuck stick you do this!! No you sure... k Not sure why but I believe you. Done what's for dinner. Good luck

This is a good post

Jan 24, 2020 at 11:37am

I think there’s a lot of us second guessers out there.
And it is difficult.
Your entire life can change based on a single decision, a job offer, asking someone out.
I just try and go with my gut, if I sense something isn’t right I stay clear.

My dear...

Jan 24, 2020 at 12:05pm

This is why you test people first. It doesn't have to be anything crazy or anything that takes a lot of effort, but put people to the test. The most effective is to allow people to think that you are weaker than they are, don't be a doormat, but allow people to show you who they are. The types you want to avoid love vulnerability of some sort, they view it as weakness. Be really nice, let them think you are weak. They will strike at you in some way. And then you'll know everything you need to know. Thank me now or later :)

Anoniimouse

Jan 24, 2020 at 12:23pm

Yeah, I can also relate. Still trying to figure out how to heal fully and learn to trust my instincts and decisions again.

ooshpick

Jan 25, 2020 at 8:22am

there is no one answer to any decision. once you have made it and 'things don't turn out like you wanted', it's tempting to imagine a different scenario. once you get into the habit of replaying your life with alternate endings it can be kind of addictive. it is a way of pretending that you're still in the situation but that moment has passed and you really don't know how the alternate would have played out either. work on letting it go. this is totally futile and it keeps you mentally exhausted and depressed

@My dear

Jan 25, 2020 at 5:25pm

Testing people is pointless(Just a simple man's opinion) people will gladly show you who they are regardless. They can not help it human beings are a faulty bunch derived from growing up in world that is indifferent to the human condition. I'll give people trust regardless if I know they are a trusting sort or not. The life I live in they are all the same, except a few and one in particular. So I find myself pretty losing all the time. I can not imagine testing them is any different than say be friending one. Just saying life test all for us does it not.

@@My dear...

Jan 26, 2020 at 2:37pm

I don't give trust, I always give respect though. Trust and love should be earned. And I don't agree that people always show you regardless...lots of people are good at pretending, never mind the psychopaths that are pros at fake charming their way into people's lives. My method was never something I invented. I'm a naturally nice and kind of vulnerable seeming person...I clued in that due to my nature I could easily see how and who a person was. I'm intelligent too though, and I figured out that my nature would make those types assume I was weak, when actually I'm quite strong. And I began to weed people out quite easily just by being myself. And so it's a tip I give to people now. I say test them, you say befriend them, and it's kind of the same thing, just a different name. When I say test, I mean give them a chance to try to be your friend. But in my head, no one is a friend or boyfriend until they have passed the test.

@@My Dear

Jan 28, 2020 at 6:05pm

You mean chance, you had said meant a chance. You ended in test, Tests are derived of preconceived notion of a typical 1-2-3 possibly 4 or more out comes. Putting a thought out in the world or word actually creates an energy. What if that energy crosses over a outcome already set in destiny except the interaction with that new energy has now changed the outcome forever. Good or Bad as it were. Destiny is a place as in destination so no grantees on what it looks like when you get there though.

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