I wish it was not the case.

I may be nuts, like really crazy. Or something I feel like the world around me is not real. I feel like I am the only one who cares, but am told that caring is not even close to my wheelhouse. I don't get it, I make improvements and no one cares I do better it's no good I'm still the same pos. I really try to empathize with others, if I cry I'm weak and disgusting, if I fall in love that person tears me down for being too this or too that and heart broken, sad and lonely beings tears that bring further disgust. I just do not want to live here no more. This planet is a really shitty place, full of shitty people. Sorry I said it didn't feel real to me, I'm sure most to all of you are really great people, I'm just nuts.

21 Comments

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Wimpy J. Wellington

Feb 18, 2020 at 4:17am

Um excuse me but I'd gladly wish it Tuesday for a hamburger and wash today

10 6Rating: +4

These are tender times.

Feb 18, 2020 at 5:24am

You are not crazy. You are simply engaged in the healthy act of feeling your feelings in a time and place when everybody is suppressing them.

6 10Rating: -4

Sorry you feel this way

Feb 18, 2020 at 7:49am

Okay, that's not an apology. But you gotta stop being defensive. If your actions hurt someone, or they tell you that they did, apologize without excuses and do it face to face. You gotta show more effort in showing you care, not just merely saying you do and expecting a parade. If you made half the effort to do things personally instead of remotely, and reflected back true remorse, made the effort to understand in detail what they must have felt and spelled out a plan on how you will make things right, you'd have far better chances of personal growth and a happy ending. All you're doing is making it all about you (your confession is a great example). That's the problem. You're not really hearing them. You're not thinking how you affect them. And your "changes" might not be trusted, or are sincere enough, especially if you ignore or minimize their feelings and fail to physically show up. A weak reach out and giving up is not effort. Physically go to them, insist on working it out, actively listen and ensure you understand their view, and know that you aren't shit for admitting wrong but that your actions can have great impact, both good and bad, and you've been doing more bad. Stop making it black and white, all or nothing. Life never is. But fail before you try, like really, really try, by giving up in a pool of self pity? Nope, you get nothing. Less about "you", more about "we" and "they". Being accountable does not make you a monster. Sincerely taking responsibility for your actions and their impact is sexy. Real effort is never easy but the results are lasting and rewarding when you persist. It's good for you and the ones you want to love.

23 6Rating: +17

Surveys says.

Feb 18, 2020 at 8:29am

To maintain sanity amongst the mentality ill one will become alienated from everything that is ill otherwise one will become what they fear the most.

Best become comfortable with oneself and learn to enjoy the silence.

13 3Rating: +10

We

Feb 18, 2020 at 8:40am

Are all nuts and most people are shitty. Lol
But the sun is shinning now.
Be happy with you.
Still a few nice peeps hanging around.
Take a trip
Open your horizons.
Huge World out there.
Sun is Shining Man..
Whoooooo
Shining..

6 3Rating: +3

Breathe

Feb 18, 2020 at 11:03am

Criticism is healthy. It's not a comment on you, just your actions. And criticism is honest commentary to help you to succeed by showing areas of improvement you might have missed. If you take them personally, you'll never learn, never improve and never improve your chances of having happiness. So, before getting offended, try out the suggestions. Be open to trying new things and new wats of seeing and being. It beats being stuck where you are currently, which is sad.

18 4Rating: +14

Most humans...

Feb 18, 2020 at 11:04am

... are very nasty creatures. Keep in mind that none of our nearest primate relatives are very nice. Chimps or Bonobos, either one, cannot really be said to be nice. Even the bonobos, which some people think are nice, they just sexually assault eachother all day long (tho they seem to like it...). They also fight, animals fight.

You're nuts if you believe in invisible things, if you just think life is sort of a bummer, that's not nuts. I recommend finding as much LSD as possible and taking it until you no longer care about the stupid monkeys. As it says in Morning Dew,

"Well there's no need for you to be worryin' about all those people
You never see those people anyway" (Grateful Dead)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LN0-gUohb9I

It's a song by Canadian Bonnie Dobson, about Nuclear Winter, and how we hope it never falls on us. But it has, the space-time continuum is destroyed by the very existence of nuclear weapons, it means that we only have a few minutes of future along many possible trajectories. Prior to nuclear weapons, there was no real trajectory for space-time that led to our death. So in a sense, in many possible futures, we're all dead in five minutes, which before the Atomic Age was not the case.

Just remember, tho, that those of us who get it have an aristocratic responsibility to do what we can do ensure that the fucking morons don't destroy space-time any further.

7 16Rating: -9

Anonymous

Feb 18, 2020 at 12:29pm

It sounds like you are having a very tough time. I won't pretend I know what that's like. Just this: If you need help, there is a place to contact so you can share your thoughts and maybe get some assistance. https://crisiscentre.bc.ca/ It is not weak to get help. It's just practical problem-solving.

13 8Rating: +5

@Wimpy J. Wellington

Feb 18, 2020 at 2:11pm

Dear Sir?Mam, I really encourage you to remember your words here today, for they will be your life another. This much I can positively say to you, there is always a awful pride, before the awful fall! Enjoy have a nice day. Oh and buy the shirt it will be fun to reflect upon one da... yeah scratch that no more days, at the end of days. Still you can wear the shirt screaming and crying into the darkest of a abyss's for ever more Sir/Mam to judge, is not to be human, this is a field that belongs to others, more capable a bias non-one sided justly fair rendering of fate, continuance or apathy. ever after.

5 9Rating: -4

@Sorry you feel this way

Feb 18, 2020 at 4:28pm

You’re writing as if you’re sure who the Op is. Maybe you do, or maybe not. Either way, what you’re saying is excellent. I wish that the person I gave up on recently would understand the concept of apologizing. Unfortunately they don’t. Apparently this is because they believe that they’re never wrong.

17 6Rating: +11

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