Screwdge

I’m fake nice to strangers. I hate most people and I don’t have a minute to spare for idiocy. Most feckless banter makes me cringe and shudder. I enjoy bashing everyone silently to myself. I get sick pleasure from the black hole that is my soul. It’s the only thing that brings me a droplet of sunshine in my mind of murky waters. You’d never know it to look at me, though. I’ve fooled you all!

16 Comments

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Well written OP

Aug 26, 2020 at 3:06pm

But I'm wondering what the people are like that you actually like.

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Anonymous

Aug 26, 2020 at 3:30pm

You sound pretty typical of most people in Van, a facade. The fact that you think your so cleaver is also pretty typical of people in Van. No one wants to admit they're really not so special.

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You’d be surprised!

Aug 26, 2020 at 4:05pm

Some people can or at least sense that you are dark. I know a few that after they’d met you would likely say he/she (I says you’s a she me thinks) is very strange and dark feeling person.

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You’d be surprised!

Aug 26, 2020 at 4:05pm

Some people can or at least sense that you are dark. I know a few that after they’d met you would likely say he/she (I says you’s a she me thinks) is very strange and dark feeling person.

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Still love

Aug 26, 2020 at 4:14pm

that scene where they meet on the dance floor. The frisson of redemption all around...the perfect braid of her hair...

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joe public

Aug 26, 2020 at 4:24pm

LOL! I feel like this could be me, but the populace must see through me, because I haven't had a friend for a decade.

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Meh

Aug 26, 2020 at 5:41pm

Way too much emotional investment. Who has this kind of time and energy?

I'm real nice to strangers.
Courtesy and manners cost me nothing and make life better for everyone. Social lubricant. Heh. With all the friction these days, society needs all the help it can get. And I get as I give.
"Medium talk" beats small every time. I constantly read, so always have stuff to talk about. Banter can be useful, and being useful to others is a survival skill.
If you hang with anyone long enough, you'll find reason to avoid them. There are no saints here, and plenty who are stupid, lazy, infantile and base. Besides, I'm an introvert. Doesn't take much to "people" me out.
Be more selective. Bashing is a lot of work; use that energy to find better companions.
The dark within is just a function of life experience. This reservoir of Yin grows over the years. We all start out with too much Yang - loud, restless, reckless, destructive and foolish. The decades burn that away, and leave darkness.
Embrace the Yin, and find some peace. Resist, and it will blight the soul.
Just as you say, about yours.
If you rot on the inside, it will manifest externally. As within, so eventually without. And no amount of cosmetic help is going to hide it for long.

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Love it!

Aug 26, 2020 at 6:14pm

Me too. Most people suck!! Just let them think you give a shit and take what you can get from them!!

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Lyrics

Aug 26, 2020 at 7:10pm

Black hole soul won't you come and wash away the rain. Black.......OH SHIT! Those are not the Soundgarden lyrics!!!! Lol.

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Oh..

Aug 26, 2020 at 8:17pm

You must be a Danite then.

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