Sometimes my mind wanders to my ex. It usually ends up being a pretty bad time because of how she wanted things to be between us. I usually end up in a rut and feeling worthless. I have to climb out myself and try to ignore those thoughts. Sometimes I just wish she’d be candid and apologize. It would at least confirm I wasn’t wrong for caring about her as person. But because she never does, I’m stuck thinking she never gave a single fuck about me. As in, never considered how I might feel, or bothered to do something good about it, or maybe even puts no value on the feelings of others. I just feel worthless and dehumanized. I wish I was free of these thoughts. Maybe I’m still in denial about what happened. Or maybe I’m just feeling self-absorbed this weekend. Thanks for hearing my rant.