I didn't know

I didn't know he planned everything ten years ago. I didn't know he bought a house and was mapping out a family. Then I showed up and he took to me like a duck to water. From the way he went for me, I just assumed everything was up in the air. What did I awaken in him to challenge all of that so easily? How much denial did he repress to put that large an obstacle up, and how shaky was all those things that he'd still try to come back for me as soon as last year? The poor guy. I guess that's the price for lack of self awareness but what a price to pay. I don't know how I feel knowing all of this. I just learned the details today.

37 Comments

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Anonymous

Oct 12, 2020 at 4:50pm

Wow you sound really important OP!

23 9Rating: +14

Huh?

Oct 12, 2020 at 5:01pm

Not sure what this post is saying.

Umm?

Oct 12, 2020 at 5:42pm

What?

Unworthy ingrate

Oct 12, 2020 at 8:10pm

If you're unable or unwilling to appreciate another person's efforts for you, then poor you. Leave them to someone more deserving.

From a womsn

Oct 12, 2020 at 8:41pm

So he prepared for family life before he met you and picked you to share that life?
Am I missing something?
What's he in denial of? What's so shaky?
Is he nice & smart & have a sense of humour?
Don't hang on if you don't want him.

23 7Rating: +16

You sound prone to

Oct 12, 2020 at 9:27pm

paralysis through over-analysis. If you two are right for each other keep it simple and make a good life.

26 3Rating: +23

Uh huh...

Oct 12, 2020 at 10:07pm

I have the suspicion it was never a matter of him being unaware of himself. More like a matter of him not being all that aware of who you were. After all, you weren't that into him. He didn't really know you. You were just showing him what you wanted him to see, so he would feel that certain special way about you. I believe you're aware of this even if you play it like you're not.

Okay...

Oct 13, 2020 at 12:13am

Are you wanting us to feel sorry for you about something? What is this?

@Uh huh

Oct 13, 2020 at 1:31am

Seems like some real passive aggressive fishing going on in your post but whatever, I'm not intimidated. Your suspicions are incorrect (sorry), he knew my feelings (and always has access with one phone call if there's need for clarification) and everything was above board because I have nothing to lose. I don't think he knew how much he felt or that those feelings are still as fresh as the day we met. The information I learned was, and still is, surprising.
Your incorrect assumptions, especially because you aren't him and weren't the recipient of my communications, and your backhanded approach for information are not surprising. See? Very straightforward.

9 34Rating: -25

Loving the reactions!

Oct 13, 2020 at 2:39am

The post is carefully worded so only two people know exactly what is being said and what it means: the OP and the chap being written about.
Some here are utterly confused and that's good because it's a confession for the sake of the OP, not written to blab to all of you so it embarrasses the chap being written about. Your curiosity isn't the reason the OP is writing. Get some friends if you want to gossip!
Others are openly unaware or not clueing in to the exact scenario and it's funny. Their assumptions tell us more about their own life circumstances because it's natural for us to try to fit things like this into our own lives as a way to connect and understand. Don't worry, you don't and you can't. Relax!
And the OP isn't writing to "get" anything from any of you. No need for sympathy, advice or validation. That's you feeling the need to feel important or relevant and that's your issue. The post is done just to get it out there. You just happen to be around to hear about it and can move on if it's not your cup of tea. But your reactions are entertaining!

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