I can’t handle the alternative

I confess that I’m staying in a relationship that I know isn’t good for me, because I can’t cope with the isolation I get otherwise. I know it’s going nowhere and I know that I “should” leave, but right now I’m just not strong enough to handle one more heartbreak. It’s not all terrible and I’m not being physically or mentally abused, I’m just being used. So I’m doing a Bill Withers and I’m using them right back.

18 Comments

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Anonymous

Nov 24, 2020 at 2:11pm

At least you're not doing it to save money on rent

12 6Rating: +6

When you free yourself

Nov 24, 2020 at 3:16pm

It will still hurt for a while.

But it’s healing hurting (finite)
Rather than helpless hurting through staying (infinite)

I feel when you have to match the energy of someone who is low vibing - to win - then you still lose. There’s no winning in that game: the best case scenario is you both lose.

I feel you. Truly. Right now, the state of the world being where it is, it’s scary to be alone and in upheaval. When you’re ready, you’ll leave. Sometimes it takes more than one attempt. That’s ok. Be kind to yourself. Just being honest with yourself about where you are at is a start. Go from there...

17 5Rating: +12

I understand.

Nov 24, 2020 at 3:34pm

A lot of people are in this same situation, especially during Covid. I don’t get all the downvotes - hypocrites mostly I think. It’s an expensive city and a huge number of people stay in bad relationships because they can’t afford to be single.

16 7Rating: +9

happy being single and not emotionally sundered.

Nov 24, 2020 at 4:04pm

Just think of how many of you are out there, seemingly trapped in these sad and bitter and broken relationships for no reason. Other than in some attempt to not be alone.
But what if in accepting the truths behind how miserable you are and setting yourself free. What if in being single again you find that side of yourself that makes you YOU. And then what if maybe after a healthy amount of time on your own, you meet someone you actually like being around.

21 7Rating: +14

wrongo

Nov 24, 2020 at 5:26pm

you can handle it. abuse begetting abuse isn't healthy. make yourself free. you won't regret it.

12 4Rating: +8

I do understand the downvotes

Nov 24, 2020 at 5:48pm

But I also understand you.

Take what you can get in the mean time, but it's high time you start working on making yourself a little more independent so you can get out of your negative situation ASAP.

Sticking around for too long can lead to irraversabble damage that will haunt you for years

18 8Rating: +10

Anonymous

Nov 24, 2020 at 6:08pm

So not having backbone and integrity is easier than feeling temporarily alone?

14 6Rating: +8

Being used

Nov 24, 2020 at 7:56pm

is a form of abuse

18 7Rating: +11

Misery Tweeting

Nov 24, 2020 at 9:36pm

Researchers in the USA have discovered that typing your way through bad experiences helps pass the time away faster and helps you feel better. They call it misery tweeting. I get the feeling that I am the one being used. Is this a confession site or a whine fest?

6 12Rating: -6

Anonymous

Nov 24, 2020 at 11:25pm

bill who?

7 8Rating: -1

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