I feel a bit off

During Covid, I have been drinking a lot... it's not like a ton... but it's also way higher than I normally have. I cannot help but think "WTF". While it hasn't interfered with work or gym/exercise life, it makes me grateful that I have these other hobbies. I am starting to understand why people can fall on their butt when they lose their job, etc., and like to drink a little. Keep your chins up and heads-up high, people! Even if it's not work... I feel like human beings were meant to be socially productive somehow or else they fall into these other things...


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In my experience

Jan 17, 2021 at 12:29am

Most people start drinking to feel less anxious, and it's a downward spiral from then on. Anxiety is high in the world right now so it's no surprise some people are drinking more. Other things - work, TV, reading, exercise - are good distractions so they help take your mind off it. Being in nature can be very calming. The trick is to try to find a healthy way to stay calm and not become overwhelmed by the madness in the world.

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Gabe Up

Jan 17, 2021 at 1:44am

I was going on 14 months of sobriety and the COVID started. I’m still not drinking...but I’m planning my resignation from this terminally ill species. Hopefully reincarnation is a thing. Might be fun? Could it be worse in the next life?

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Jan 17, 2021 at 2:40pm

Cue the person who will shame people for not being able to enjoy responsibably .. what a crock. Project much

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@Gabe Up

Jan 17, 2021 at 2:59pm

Forced reincarnation is a terrible idea imo, and would be so extremely cruel - orders of magnitude more cruel than just one non-consentual life. Also what would be the point, if you're literally a different person with a different body and mind each time, and that each time you had effectively zero awareness of any other incarnations? There wouldn't even be any true progression because we'd be essentially starting from scratch as a new person with every incarnation.


Also on giving up... it can be quite hard and motivation-killing sometimes - especially if one never had a real chance at much of a life to begin with, and we're just surrounded by obscure symbolism, whispers, shadows and the indirect all the time. There's no substance or reality to it, just words and ideas and could-be-but-never-is. If that doesn't kill inspiration or the desire to change, I don't know what would.

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Jan 18, 2021 at 12:28am

and everyone else right now!! Bottoms up!

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@@Gabe Up

Jan 18, 2021 at 11:09am

Re that second paragraph - in hindsight… being surrounded by indirect connections and behaviors based on something very real, intimate and beautiful (but elusive, for valid reasons that I’m just now starting to understand more clearly) is much better than not having that at all, and just being stuck in the same horrible agonizing paralyzing situation but in normal boring dead overlimited unfree separated alienated consensus reality.

Even if some of the connections and surrounding related behaviors and events are traumatizing or physically interrupt sleep – even then… it’s better than the alternative of its absence (and the absence of the realities causing it all), that’s for sure.

This time around it might be temporarily painful (and is) (...and needlessly LOUD sometimes, from what I can tell >_<), but I could use all the help I can get, since I’ve basically never had any in my entire life before in any direct or effective way regarding this whole thing.

Just wanted to say that, to add to and rectify the original reply. It’s not going to make sense to many people assuming it’s read by them, but it will to who I’m directing it at. :)

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I love

Jan 18, 2021 at 3:02pm

The existential turn this thread has taken.

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@I love

Jan 18, 2021 at 5:54pm

Thanks, I'm not used to compliments :P

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re@@Gabe Up

Jan 18, 2021 at 6:28pm

am i reading your ambiguous post right? you are creeping some dude in your building and think he has hidden feelings for you or something?

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Gabe Up

Jan 18, 2021 at 11:18pm

The point of it would be starting fresh with a physical body that is free of this pain. When I got sober I stopped everything. Pain meds... antidepressants. I was actually doing ok (pain wise) for a while and then it started again. Mentally I’m tired. The doctors keep passing me off to someone else. If I tell them it hurts here(pointing to my body)... psychiatrist says i need to see my gp. I wait a week in agony to see my gp. They tell me it’s all in my head. Which is it? 10+ years of this hot potato game. That’s my reason. Start fresh... even if it’s a different new pain. That would be fair. Life is suffering after all.

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