Hello. I have been struggling with depression for a long time now. I’ve dropped out from college twice this year and I feel like an absolute failure. The thing that pushed me over was having my last miscarriage as I found out I cannot have my own children. I just don’t want to exist anymore. It’s very hard to find help in my city as no one is taking patients. And online therapy I do not have the money for. I feel so hopeless that I’m started to neglect my dog. It makes me feel so horrible I can do this to him. I know that this is basically a rant but I do not have anyone else to talk to because my husband works to make money and I don’t want to make him worried about me. Thank you kind strangers I appreciate you for listening.