Unpopular opinion?
posted February 23rd, 2021 at 2:25 PM
I was having a discussion with my gf about our potential future baby (I'm not pregnant). She mentioned that if I were to have a medical emergency during childbirth and had to choose between saving only the baby or only me, she would choose to save the baby. She didnt hesitate for a moment. This really upset me. Her reasons were that it has its whole life ahead of it and I've already lived 27 years. Am I silly to feel hurt?
25 Comments
Post a CommentNot silly
Feb 23, 2021 at 3:24pm
But what valuable info to have: pretty clear you will need to have a rock solid living will, regular will, and an iron-clad prenup in place should you decide to actually raise a human with this person. Also great info to know that you will always be second in her life. She has given a dumb reason, I bet she also shrugs off Covid with reasoning like “it only seems to be bad for the elderly”.
This is a really good reason to either have someone else as your official next of kin, and to get started on your end of life wishes NOW and make sure all medical providers have all scenarios in writing. She’ll pull the plug on you. Hope you don’t get in a car accident any time soon....!
Stupid Question
Feb 23, 2021 at 4:03pm
Don’t ask hypothetical questions you don’t want to know the answer to or think the answer may hurt you. It’s really not very smart. What would you do? Choose to end the baby’s life? You don’t know unless you’re in the situation which you’re not so it’s best not to speculate with things like that. You have no right to be upset at your gf over a hypothetical situation. That’s just childish. It’s the same thing as her being upset with you for picking her life over your baby’s. What would you think of that? Is that romantic? What kind of impact do you suppose that may have on your relationship? It’s just ridiculous to even consider all that if you don’t have to. You should be upset with yourself for even asking her such an intrusive question.
Sounds like it
Feb 23, 2021 at 4:43pm
Is time to dump her!! Then get as far away from her as possible.
the truth shall set you free
Feb 23, 2021 at 4:54pm
would you not be equally as upset that she wouldn’t save your baby?
what did you really want to know when asking this? that she was pragmatic or realistic.
stupid question has clear intent. you asked and she told you. whatever war you’re waging with yourself post haste is completely obtuse.
hypothetically, if she let the baby die, you’d be holding it against her just as hard.
so maybe the problem here is with your understand of the truth and how it is meant to enlighten us, not punish.
I would leave
Feb 23, 2021 at 5:37pm
It is the moment that I would realize that my partner cares about having children more than their relationship with me.
I care about the relationship first and having that rock solid before ever considering adding children to it.
Don't Even Go There
Feb 23, 2021 at 5:52pm
Seriously. Stoopid question. You can't predict what you will do. Totally unfair to even ask. It's not even a question of morals or ethics or who gets to live longer, if it ever in fact did happen then circumstances will dictate actions. Honestly. Same as asking which one of you in a lifeboat should be thrown out into the ocean to die in order to save the others...right?! wow.
So. You either let your GF know how you feel and that it's a dumbass question or let it slide. Kind of ignorant to put you on the spot if you ask me as it doesn't prove anything.
Yes. Silly, but I've seen sillier.
Feb 23, 2021 at 6:36pm
Maybe you don't want kids as much as you thought you did, and you're not compatible when it comes to the big relationship decisions. I would think anyone making the decision to bring kids into the world would want their partner to make exactly that decision she's willing to. But what do I know, I don't have kids.
Happy Sad Flappy Glad
Feb 23, 2021 at 7:19pm
Get this.
My ex wife asked me one day if she ever had a disease like Help C & if she was dying from it, would I show my love for her by having unprotected sex with her so I could catch it & get infected....she is my ex wife for many reasons......that was one reason....that is fucked up completely
That is so disturbing
Feb 23, 2021 at 8:35pm
At 27, a young woman is invested in this life, could have job/career plans, adventures, accomplishments and everything ahead of her, never mind a partner/husband, friends, family who would have to suffer the loss. I can't even imagine having a partner who would consider my life that disposable, at that age. I'd be gone.
I think
Feb 23, 2021 at 9:26pm
You should strongly reconsider having a child with your GF.
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