Shocked and saddened

I recently learned that a close family member who I thought loved and respected me does not. During some family drama regarding someone else in our family, they let their true feelings about me be known. I learned that they have serious contempt for me and feel very superior, and that this has been their true feelings forever. I’m not allowing their opinion to make me feel badly about myself though, because I’m confident that I’m worthy of love and respect. But this new knowledge has irreparably damaged our relationship, and that makes me very sad indeed.

19 Comments

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How unfortunate.

Mar 26, 2021 at 12:59pm

Well I hope you be okay not having them around I'm thinking it won't be that bad after your reaching with the family thing though you learned never verified the person was actual in a dark corner like this. After you spoke and asked how they were and what they spoke and you felt the same contempt you spoke about being passed on or esse dropping. Family is a thing we have not much of and should never dicete any member with out proof of serious charge. So probably not as close that it will be hard to get ovee

8 14Rating: -6

tiredeyes

Mar 26, 2021 at 1:20pm

:'-( <3

it's good that you recognize that you're worthy of love but this is still deeply saddening nonetheless. i hope there is possibility yet for them to reconcile their feelings.

10 7Rating: +3

R. Burgundy

Mar 26, 2021 at 1:39pm

I’m hurt. Shocked, offended... and hurt.

9 10Rating: -1

For Future Reference

Mar 26, 2021 at 2:04pm

For anyone.
Start keeping track of your friends and family- actually get a piece of paper, write names, and draw columns.
Then put a tick mark for every time you contact them,and every time they contact you. Or email. Or on social media. etc
You'll probably notice a trend- and the ones that never contact you, just stop. And if they don't-it's obviously one sided on your part.
And you now know where you stand in their priorities...and act accordingly.

@How unfortunate

Mar 26, 2021 at 2:28pm

What on earth are you talking about? Are you high or drunk or what?

10 9Rating: +1

Not to

Mar 26, 2021 at 5:16pm

be mean but something interesting is that you thought you were friends all along while they hated you the whole time? That’s very weird! Why would this person misrepresent their true feelings towards you, and why exactly do they resent you so much? Also how did you not notice? There must have been some red flags that they weren’t exactly a big fan of yours. There’s obviously a lot more to the story

Interesting

Mar 26, 2021 at 5:58pm

Is this actually a blood/marriage family member or a family friend?
Did they actually say "I'm superior to you" or are you just asuming this? If they didn't actually speak those words, you shouldn't assume.
Also, did you really have no clue how they felt about you? There were no little hints along the way?

12 8Rating: +4

Makes me wonder

Mar 26, 2021 at 8:07pm

How much of human expression in general is just masked contempt.

14 4Rating: +10

I get it

Mar 26, 2021 at 11:20pm

I've had the same kind of thing happen to me recently. When under pressure, my family members are showing their true colours, some for better, some for worse. One in particular is being arrogant, entitled and contemptuous, to everyone, not just me. I had thought better of them, but now I see who they are. I had wanted a closer relationship with them, but now I see it's better to keep my distance.

12 5Rating: +7

Anonymous

Mar 26, 2021 at 11:47pm

Most people are duplicitous, I prefer an obnoxious jerk to some two-faced fraud. What you see is what you get with a jerk.

18 7Rating: +11

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