You made your bed

My ex will not leave me alone. Texting me calling me leaving terrible messages. Saying mean horrible untrue things. Trying to tell me what to do still, guilt tripping me about things I now have no control over because of his short sidedness and his possible bipolar issues. Not a nice person. I have blocked his number so he calls me from work or emails me from my son's email. We tried staying friends for the children but that didn't work for details already explained above. He's very controlling and hurtful and I've been done with him for quite sometime. Not sure what to do next ? Why won't he leave me alone ?

19 Comments

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Anonymous

May 25, 2021 at 4:31am

He is going crazy from not being around to be heard anymore.

It's eating him up, and makes him do stuff he might not ordinarily do.

Unfortunately, some people can get even worse than your ex, behavior wise.

It's called D.1.V.O.R.C.E. and other than white liberal fantasy, it's a dirty rotten business from start to finish.

9 5Rating: +4

northislandgal

May 25, 2021 at 7:24am

call the cops

14 5Rating: +9

Suggest you

May 25, 2021 at 10:07am

1) watch your back and 2) call one of the free legal advice lines 3) get into a woman's self defence course and carry some legally ok protection ie. dog spray

17 3Rating: +14

Tricky situation

May 25, 2021 at 10:59am

The communication tactics (not respecting boundaries and circumventing a blocked number) sound like harassment.

The communication style (controlling, guilt tripping) sounds like emotional blackmail.

If you haven't already done this, start documenting. Keep receipts on all written communication, backup copies of voicemail, and a running log (time, date, and summary) of any attempts at contact.

Try to anticipate that you will be baited to respond. Best not to engage or explain yourself, and even better to stay no contact if possible. If you must have contact because of child custody, etc., google "grey rock" for ideas on how to communicate.

You may also want to look up information about "FOG" (how to deal with interactions characterized by fear, obligation, and guilt) and watch some reputable videos on emotional abuse.

If possible, don't fall into a trap where this person is isolating you with their issues. If there is a trusted person or professional you can confide in, do so. It is good to have someone in your corner who can reinforce your truth.

I realize this is extremely delicate situation and there may be myriad reasons why you might not want to report it. But getting knowledge, evidence, and support in place is a good start. Sending strength and sunlight.

19 5Rating: +14

Get...

May 25, 2021 at 11:05am

...restraining order. That’s harassment.

20 4Rating: +16

Do you....

May 25, 2021 at 11:49am

have children together...and are you blocking his access to see them?

8 6Rating: +2

Go to

May 25, 2021 at 1:14pm

The police and then get a restraining order against the Douchebag

13 2Rating: +11

Been there

May 25, 2021 at 2:28pm

Get a restraining order

17 3Rating: +14

Watch out for your safety.

May 25, 2021 at 3:08pm

If he's obsessively controlling and angry, he's a very real threat to your safety. Don't wait, file a restraining order.

16 3Rating: +13

This Confession

May 25, 2021 at 5:24pm

Makes for great tv drama or a soap opera.

8 16Rating: -8

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