Am self aware enough to notice I again have attraction to a former employee (started when they were hired) and have also crushed on colleagues in the past (not a great pattern!). I might keep in touch with this person but probably should do best to avoid them as it’s highly unlikely to be reciprocal and because of the way we met. I’m not experienced or confident in my private life haven’t ever dated and don’t interact with many people aside from meeting through work. But it’s simply not appropriate or very smart to ever entertain these crushes. It feels ludicrous and embarrassing hence the confession. I will wait it out and it will pass. I have enough hobbies and interests. Hope one day I gain confidence to try striking up something with a stranger or viable acquaintance. I am very grateful for my life but I do notice when I have a crush that it’s a bit lonely. Thanks to other posters I know I’m not a special snowflake and I focus on my own happiness / dating myself etc. Goal is crushes that I could actually pursue !