Dreams die everyday

I moved away from Vancouver to get away from the memory of, and the chance of running into, an ex. Like a normal person, I always wonder what if? Yet, Vancouver does not seem like the city I left. It always does not seem like it will be returning to the sleep Pacific Northwest oasis it always was. Seattle is kind of the same. Maybe I am just being cathartic about a lost love, but maybe the lost love was the city I loved and which I grew up in. The dream I left is no more. The life I wanted that broke my heart wouldn't have turned out anyways. Maybe it was meant to be. Maybe it was destiny.

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Anonymous

Sep 11, 2021 at 4:20pm

Same. I left Vancouver years ago because I couldn’t bare the thought of running into an ex, and also because everything in the city would remind me of them.

Little did I know at the time that the one thing I could never run away from was the memory of them. Now, years later and after so much money spent on therapy, I realize that every day will feel like the first day after I had lost them. Empty with no desire for moving on or rebuilding. I’m now just putting in time until it’s over.

9 2Rating: +7

I hear you

Sep 11, 2021 at 6:25pm

I didn’t leave but I wish I had. All those years ago when I decided instead to stay and try to make a doomed relationship work. It didn’t. The past 20 years have been a series of catastrophes culminating in nothing. No relationship, no love, no home, no career, and living in what has become hell for anyone who isn’t wealthy. This isn’t the city I grew up in. The wonderful parts of it have disappeared under a stampede of people, leaving rubble in their wake. Be thankful that you left.

14 2Rating: +12

Vancouver now Vancoocoo

Sep 11, 2021 at 6:27pm

Too much rush, congestion, pollution and sensory overload. I road the West Coast Express commuter train out to its last stop mid-lower Fraser Valley and found more affordable housing, friendly people and an easier way of life. Oops, maybe I'm not suppose to be telling too many people. Anyways I got while the getting was good.

11 1Rating: +10

Afterlife

Sep 11, 2021 at 6:44pm

"Maybe I am just being cathartic about a lost love, but maybe the lost love was the city I loved and which I grew up in."

I totally get that. People, places, and points in time are all part of the same dance and it makes sense that we grieve them collectively.

Your confession brought me to tears on this emotionally tender day and I want to send you a big hug through the ether. If it helps, the Rumi quote, "The wound is the place where the Light enters you" has given me some comfort through these hard times.

11 2Rating: +9

Yes, it's gone

Sep 11, 2021 at 8:16pm

Much more affordable and fun in 1994 when I moved here. Lots of second run movie houses, nightlife happening 7 days a week and cheap rents. Now's it's just a sea of luxury cars and condos going up that I could never afford.

18 1Rating: +17

Ditto

Sep 12, 2021 at 12:43am

I feel you. I’ve been in your shoes and know what it’s like. My ex significant other lives in New Westminster. When we were together, we always spent a lot of time at all the great restaurants and stores there. Haven’t set foot in that town ever since we split up. Every time I ride the Skytrain to downtown Vancouver, I turn my back towards New West and just face the river. Now unfortunately I have nothing but bad memories of that city, which I’m still trying to erase from my mind but can’t. Honestly, I have no purpose there anymore.

8 1Rating: +7

Cheer up

Sep 12, 2021 at 2:49am

We all need a change of scenery at some point in our lives. There’s nothing wrong with leaving the old city behind and moving to a new place to start over.

5 2Rating: +3

Plenty fish in the sea.

Sep 12, 2021 at 4:04am

If you went out into the world and led full lives, you wouldn't be spending your time fixating on one person. How bizarre, you left a city... just to avoid one person. Weird.

7 8Rating: -1

Anonymous

Sep 12, 2021 at 4:25am

Oasis lol

More like bolt hole for foreign millionaires.

7 2Rating: +5

Ex for a reason

Sep 12, 2021 at 9:05am

Life is like a book, you finished that last horrible chapter and now it's time to move on to the next chapter of the story, that being your life.
You wouldn't go back and reread or even think about the last chapter you just finished.
Why cause it's done.
Fuck old memories, make some new ones.
Never let anyone dictate your life.

11 4Rating: +7

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