Fear of love

I lived alone since I’m 16 and in all those years I could not love anybody or anything ! Now I’m 32 and scared that I am not equipped with a love system in me ! Ha ha I guess I always liked freedom of not attaching myself to one place , person or a thing !

20 Comments

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Fire sign rising

Sep 26, 2021 at 4:17pm

A primal fear of being trapped in a stifling, prison-like situation is legit, and sometimes worse than fear of abandonment. I get that.

As long as you're not asking anyone else to meet your emotional needs when you can't meet theirs, I guess you're all good.

9 3Rating: +6

There’s a reason

Sep 26, 2021 at 6:49pm

For everything that prevents us from enjoying a happy and fulfilling life, there’s a reason. Very likely it’s from past traumas that haven’t been properly processed. I urge you to do whatever it takes to deal with these issues now, before you’ve lived 7 decades and you’re alone and sad. Trust me on this one.

14 3Rating: +11

rolling eyes

Sep 26, 2021 at 8:33pm

Yeah, because if someone is alone (aka single) they are going to be sad, right? Only partnered people can be truly happy, fulfilled, etc..?
Give your easily-programmed heads a shake or two or few.

15 9Rating: +6

How?

Sep 26, 2021 at 10:01pm

How were you able to live on your own at age 16? Was there a large inheritance? I'm wondering how a 16 year old (and I'm assuming you're not a celebrity) becomes financially independent.

4 10Rating: -6

@Rolling eyes

Sep 27, 2021 at 1:40am

Although of course a person can be happy alone, the reality is that we human animals are biologically designed to live with other people. Our entire society is proof of it. The majority of people who live alone long term aren’t doing so because they genuinely love it, but because they’ve given up on finding a partner and they’re making the best of it. But deep down I think most of us would agree that having a loving partner would be preferable.

16 2Rating: +14

@Rolling

Sep 27, 2021 at 12:50pm

Op never said anything about that: you're taking a generic observation and twisting into your agenda ie using a Straw Man Fallacy

8 3Rating: +5

@ 2nd @Rolling

Sep 27, 2021 at 7:11pm

It wasn't directed at OP but the commenter above mine in response to the "sad and alone".

@ 1st @Rolling. Disagree. Oh, I agree that there are some people who have given up and are making the best of it, but I wouldn't say most. Some never were looking in the first place because they realized that they have a choice - go along with societal programming or live in the way that best suits them. And I disagree about the "biologically designed to live together". Biologically designed to have sex, sure. But living together or solo isn't a biological program.

8 3Rating: +5

Something in your box

Sep 28, 2021 at 12:20am

Witch may tick you off

2 2Rating: 0

?

Sep 28, 2021 at 1:04am

Heres a question, do you truly want to fall in love ? It may be less being incapable of love but more a case of unwilling to

4 3Rating: +1

Gollyrump Fuddlepuck

Sep 28, 2021 at 3:42am

Sex is a good thing
From which to
Get off!

2 2Rating: 0

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