if you're an honest person

you will never escape your class. you might make more money and dress well now. you might have a nice home. you might have great taste. and the people around you as you move up don't reflect that, not everyone moves up. most are born and remain in the same position and if you change, you might disgrace the class you're from if you so choose to. i remember my mom stopped by my work to say hi to me, my boss didn't say hi to her even though i introduced her to my coworkers. my mom looks worn out and speaks accented english, in a graphic tee and skinny jeans and sneakers that don't match, with a wire cart for groceries. that was one of the last straws that had me leave that shop. it didn't pay much but the owners didn't have to make much, they have their families behind them. it's stuff like that that makes me lose respect instantly. i have a lot of empathy, for rage, for irresponsibility, for flakiness, for the misuse of hurtful words, for ignorance, for alcoholism, for all our flaws, but that sort of behaviour isn't problematic. it's hatred. i've experienced this a lot, my father gets a lot of looks for having one leg. my step-father for being black. i've seen that look from people many times in my life and it fills me with disgust. people look at me now and assume that i must come from some traditional family, middle class at least. if i model or if i own the places i've just been working for. i give off a distinguished impression that wasn't intentional, with a clear voice and tasteful clothes that exude confidence, spare the tee shirts (sometimes). but my family is where i come from and if you can't accept that, you will not have anything to do with me. if asked for my honest opinion, i'll speak of how you looked at my mother. because that's all anyone needs to know to understand who you really are.

15 Comments

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Anonymous

Oct 4, 2021 at 7:23am

My upper middle class parents both fully conspired to destroy my life when I was a teenager.

Where does that leave me?

4 7Rating: -3

Weak

Oct 4, 2021 at 10:51am

I remember dim witted highschool counselor acting snobbish when I mentioned my parent was seamstress. It's beside the point I was accepted to one if the top schools in the nation but I had immediate contempt for this guy (I still have for this type) and never for a second my family was any less than anybody else. Mrly parent have heart and generosity in them than guy like this and 5 generations of his ancestors have put together. Amazing how many a holes use oxygen on this earth

18 1Rating: +17

Serafina

Oct 4, 2021 at 3:44pm

Amazing, the assumptions people make, eh? My mother was a physician but due mental health issues, lost her job and spent time at various mental facilities. She lived off disability for a while and now, in her senior years, works at a call centre. She went to an Ivy for undergrad and went to one of the most prestigious medical schools in the country. The ones that used to look at us as equals, upper middle class people, look at us like the help. You find out who the good ones are.

16 1Rating: +15

Theodore Roosevelt Island NY Tooth Fairy Communist

Oct 4, 2021 at 6:18pm

Well....that was a depressing Confession.

2 12Rating: -10

So true

Oct 4, 2021 at 7:08pm

I’m one of those people who once held very senior professional level positions, but disability and some serious trauma derailed my career. I know several other people (including a couple who are now homeless) whose current situation isn’t at all how they started out. One’s job doesn’t define who they are or how intelligent they are either. That store clerk might be a PhD for all you know. Anyone who decides that respect is only due to someone who fits into society’s narrow definition of worthiness isn’t worthy of it at all, in my opinion.

18 1Rating: +17

Too bad you aren't in a higher class…

Oct 4, 2021 at 7:40pm

… then maybe you could afford a new CAPS key. Seriously, your post was very hard to read. Click post comment

3 22Rating: -19

@Too bad

Oct 4, 2021 at 7:57pm

Perfect illustration of someone who equates intelligence with class. Money can’t buy class, and some of the richest people have none. I’m not a fan of how the Op writes, but that doesn’t negate the truth of what they said.

17 3Rating: +14

@@Too bad

Oct 5, 2021 at 6:44am

writing is not sign of real intelligence like STEM. Putting words together also is separate from ability to meaningful thinking.

1 5Rating: -4

And all those old movies

Oct 5, 2021 at 11:11am

when everyone is smoking. And the women are only doing the household chores.

1 2Rating: -1

The issue...

Oct 5, 2021 at 8:34pm

.. is that the fundamental unit of organization is the family and not the individual. Individuals rarely change their class position but I know plenty of people who because they married in their undergrad and then helped each other along they went from families who were maybe okay they weren't like wage labourers they were people in forestry and middle managers in provincial government and things like that and they had a boy and a girl respectively and now those people are quite well off. The problem is that individuals can't do anything in life. But that's all you see on television some individual doing something great but that's one of her real life Works. In real life everything happens with groups of people. Even if you're an independent businessman you have suppliers you have clients so it's always a group activity. Television doesn't show any of this. And school certainly don't teach it. So there is more room for class Mobility than many people think but you know the biggest thing people spend money on his housing. And now that I know some of the history of my family we had property all over the Lower Mainland but each generation sold it off for the next-generation to pay the bank for it rather than working together. Now we're actually together enough that we've never had really any hiccups in this. But imagine how much better our class position would have been if we'd worked together and maintained all those all set. Just one little branch of the family A little back-of-the-envelope math has the today as a family we have something like four million dollars in real estate.

1 1Rating: 0

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