It happens, right?

I haven’t had sex in over a year. It wasn’t my intention to be celibate, but it happened. I spent my early 20’s in university, working in nightclubs, partying, travelling, etc. By 25, I had slept with 300+ people. I thought I was having fun, but I had no awareness of what I was doing too. I didn’t realize I was avoiding the truth of my childhood trauma. I needed to grow up, fast. I decided to prioritize working on myself and getting healthier. Between that and running my business, it’s been a year for me.

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Anonymous

Jan 28, 2022 at 4:22pm

I slept with 50,000 people. And my house has 14 baftrooms. And my dingus so enormous.

0 0Rating: 0

Not Only That

Jan 28, 2022 at 4:31pm

But you've irrevocably destroyed your ability to pair bond. In other words, if you do should happen to get married the odds of you divorcing are closing on 100%.

I sure hope you are not suggesting

Jan 28, 2022 at 5:32pm

that people who have had lots of sex partners are immature or somehow less evolved!
No, I am not speaking (self-)defensively as I haven't had sex (by choice) for over 8 years and I didn't have many bfs/sex partners back when I was sexually active.
I wish I had been sexually free in my younger years, but I was too scared of contracting a std or going home with someone dangerous. I have a Lot of respect for people who are comfortable/free sexually (as long as they are honest with the people they get with).

0 0Rating: 0

Distraction

Jan 28, 2022 at 6:55pm

It only works for a while. As much as we think we’ve managed to put all the bad stuff behind us, unless we’ve actually done the work to face it and work through that pain, it’s going to come back and bite us in the ass sooner or later. We can work until we’re exhausted, party until we can’t remember, starve ourselves or stuff ourselves, exercise until we drop, but it still lurking. I found that truth out the hard way. 7 decades later and I’m working on it now. Better late than never , right?

23 2Rating: +21

@I sure hope you are not suggesting

Jan 29, 2022 at 7:32am

Mature/immature is a sort of binary. It's more that the "science" (we trust the science!) says that people who are married with 0 sex partners each stay together far better than those who are married after a 4 year degree of having sex with a different person (or three) every weekend.

Now, this could be because people who have the self-restraint (or who are ugly) are better at marriage, because they are restrained and/or have other options, but I am skeptical.

Also, sleeping around wastes time. If you want to have children, it has to be for their sake, for the sake of creating new life. So, you can say "I will wait..." and then you get hit by a bus the next day. You don't have children to fulfill yourself, you have children as an act of creation. That is one motivation anyway.

So, you never know when the bus comes, and waiting around increases the odds you get hit by the bus without having kids.

If you try to look for a "reason" to have kids you will never find one, sex is a desire, procreation is predicated of desire, and sex is the desire to leave behind an image of oneself. Focus on the sex act itself is, I guess, sort of immature in a classical sense.

I don't agree with that sort of rhetoric, people should make their own sexual choices, but they should also realize that choices have consequences, and that it is much easier to have children, biologically, at 25 than at 35. A 25 year old will also have more neuroplasticity and be better able to adapt to the exigencies of children.

2 17Rating: -15

Sex is overrated

Jan 29, 2022 at 7:37am

Good for you! I used to be pretty promiscuous in my youth and enjoyed sex a lot, but usually in the context of one monogamous partner at a time. I never wanted to get married or anything. Then at 27 I met an amazing guy that I clicked with on every level, had lots of great sex with him and married him. We were together for almost 10 years, but then he got cancer and died. I have no desire to date again, and casual meaningless sex (like one night stand) isn't my style. I can't imagine ever being with anyone else. Deciding to stop having sex is okay.
I wish you well! :)

23 2Rating: +21

Good for you

Jan 29, 2022 at 8:15am

Using this time to work on yourself. There's plenty of people that were celibate not by choice in 2021 and did nothing to improve themselves

9 2Rating: +7

@Not Only

Jan 29, 2022 at 9:59am

Why the down votes?
Divorce rates are 55% for first marriages, 75% for second marriages,and 75% for common law unions anyways.

Studies and stats have proven this.

7 3Rating: +4

If you slept with 300 people this means

Jan 29, 2022 at 3:56pm

That you gave your essence away,
Parts of yourself, parts of your beauty you gave
Away.
And now you are
There
SittiNg with 300 pages of your soul that you gave away
Of yourself. Pages
Of the book of your life that were
Ripped
Out and given to unworthy readers.

And that part of yourself
That you gave away is not there anymore.

You feel not yourself,
anymore. This is why. But there’s hope
And
Life
To get yourself
Back.
Don’t
Give yourself
Away anymore,
Going forward…
Is because each time you joined
Yourself intimately sexual with the layers of you,
You joined

Joined
With their layers of themselves.

Now they are
Walking around With you in them and them in you and
Times X 300 = fragmented self’s
Of you now given to those idiots and parts of them in you and walking around Vancouver fragments of
Persons not whole- not at peace!
As
A
Fragment
Of you in them and fragments
Of them in you.

This is why you’re
Feeling low.

Call back those layers
You gave away
And
Don’t give
Yourself away anymore!
Be
Selective.

Be your unified
Self
How beautiful you are.
How
Amazing you are-
In all your essence.The wonderment of your smile and your eyes and your soul so perfectly made are
You
Your essence can be restored again!!
That part of you so valuable
Shall not ever be squandered AGAIN!!!!!

7 17Rating: -10

You’re being restored

Jan 29, 2022 at 3:58pm

Even NOW

0 0Rating: 0

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