Craving Real

It’s so rare. Finding the real people who you can talk to about anything. Real feelings, real emotions, genuine opinions about world events, philosophy, science. Everything is open for discussion. You can say anything without having to worry about whether you’re being PC enough or whether they’re going to judge you. I’ve got two precious people in my life like this and I cling to them tightly, because everyone else is much too worried about being popular, or they just don’t have the depth or intelligence to dive beneath the surface of things. The problem is that I almost never see my two special friends because one of them lives about an 8 hour drive away and the other one is too busy most of the time. I’m just so tired of small talk or complaints and gossip. I need REAL.

10 Comments

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Anonymous

May 22, 2022 at 7:46am

People desire being accepted into the fold whether they feel the same deep down or not. It leads to a degree of tightlippedness on most topics where nobody really is saying how they feel for fear of losing friends acquaintances family etc...It takes courage to voice your opinions and not waver when in today's world the chances are you'll get punished or ostracized for expressing them by people who won't give you the time of the day because they've already internally made up their mind how to judge you based on arbitrary points.

19 0Rating: +19

Help yourself thru helping the less fortunate

May 22, 2022 at 12:10pm

You'll meet real people doing likewise

15 0Rating: +15

Put your…

May 22, 2022 at 10:55pm

Screen down and look at the human in front of you. Put yourself in their shoes. They’re not far from you.

2 1Rating: +1

automaton

May 23, 2022 at 2:11am

Continue to cling to your two friends tightly; they are becoming a rare breed.

11 0Rating: +11

Man got it all wrong

May 23, 2022 at 6:32am

Who cares what people think if you can't be your true self and voice your opinions without worrying your not going to be liked. Then your hanging with the wrong people.
You can voice your opinions without crushing someone's else's even if you don't always agree.
Live and let live is my motto .

8 0Rating: +8

@Put your

May 23, 2022 at 6:53am

What makes you think there’s a person in front of me? I live alone, and when I’m with other people I am not on any screen because I think it’s incredibly rude and dismissive to the other person. Stop making assumptions.

4 2Rating: +2

It is...

May 23, 2022 at 6:03pm

... increasingly difficult, due to changes in work/educational regulation in BC, Canada, and much of the Western World. I find that people give or take twice my age don't bat an eye at much of the stuff I say, which is mostly just to see what they think about it. With many people my age (mid 30s) it boils down to there being lots of "thoughtcrime" and "wordcrime," like 'why would you even say that??' when it is just to have a discussion.

I have an algorithm to test people, to see if they are automatons or not, but it wouldn't get past the censors, but I will describe it in broad strokes.

First you start with nouns, "dirty words" or "adult language" or "swears" we used to call them. I'll use some of the ones my WWII vet Grandfather (about as anti-fascist as you can get, he signed on for an EXTRA year in the Forces routing the Nazis!) used. If they can pass that, then we move onto full verbal phrases on a number of topics. If they can stand that, then I might have found an actual live human being, instead of a meat puppet.

0 2Rating: -2

Water Cooler

May 25, 2022 at 1:10pm

This hearkens back to something I said on a last day on the job without realizing the loaded dual meaning it had at the time. The way people manipulated those words, gossiped and spread rumours was eye opening to the say the least...It showed me the way words can be taken out of context depending on the flavour of the day. They carry different weights by whomever wields them and to what advantage, and people will believe what they want at the end of the day. But if I hadn't spoken from the heart I'd never know the way those people really felt about me, what was resonance from resentment, and some might still be around. It also made me think that attachments to certain people, places, ideas and thoughts are done intentionally to subvert shedding old skins and embrace illusion. In hindsight it put things into perspective for me why my career was a constant uphill battle of a failure. Some places and people aren't meant to be where we should put ourselves and is just us delaying the inevitable. If I had spoken from the heart more often it might have pushed the ugliness to the forefront where it could no longer be ignored. If I could do it again, I probably would have sung them the old breakup tune except not as graciously, it's not me it's you haha. I know your post wasn't really work-related but so much of our lives are spent there, it's a shame most of it is abandoning the person you really are to fit into society's standards of success.

5 1Rating: +4

@Water cooler

May 26, 2022 at 7:21pm

I understand what you’re saying. Some environments aren’t conducive to being real. Unfortunately the overwhelming majority of work environments fit into this category. I’m completely familiar with that and I’m able to conform (to a degree) for most of them. But that’s only because I’ve learned after a long working career that I’m not that person who does well in idle lunch room or water cooler chats. So I’ve learned that for me, it’s best if I’m just polite but distant with my coworkers. I rarely engage with anyone from work outside of it, and while I’m there I just do my job and eat my lunch in my office (assuming I have time to actually eat lol). Working from home has been much more comfortable for me without all of the expectations of socializing with people with whom I have almost nothing in common.

2 0Rating: +2

Friend

Jun 7, 2022 at 11:27pm

I may be 8 hours away but you can always call xo

0 0Rating: 0

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