Ablaze

I’ve become a dull person. I wish I had the resources to go find what wakes me up as a human being but I don't. I feel afraid to risk the stability I’ve acquired. But which decision will I regret when I’m 80? Will I curse myself for not saving enough money to live or will I regret not making my life worth living? I don’t think I can strike a balance to afford both.

10 Comments

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Oh man

Jun 12, 2022 at 11:43pm

Join the club. I can totally relate as to what it feels like to be dull. I’ve been in your shoes. Compared to most people, I feel so boring.

9 1Rating: +8

Anonymous

Jun 13, 2022 at 12:23am

Canada has signed social security agreements with 50 countries. A social security agreement is an international agreement between Canada and other countries pension schemes, so you're still paying into a system. Look into that. It's not the same as being all fancy-free and travelling the world, but living overseas and working is pretty interesting and enjoyable.

8 2Rating: +6

this is kind of relatable

Jun 13, 2022 at 3:22am

Adult-itis is a terrible affliction. It's very pervasive, and very real.

What exactly is it that stifles and wears us down so much over the years that we become this way - shadows of what we could be, or used to be? At least several often overlapping factors, from what I can tell.

The societies we live in are not healthy, for the most part.

So much is possible and human potential is so utterly vast, but less than 1% of it gets actualized in most cases. It's not right.

9 1Rating: +8

Dilemma

Jun 13, 2022 at 6:14am

I understand how you feel. This is a problem many people are experiencing now thanks to the extremely high cost of living in this part of the world. Unfortunately it’s not likely going to get any easier because the gap between those at the top and the rest of us is becoming impossible to bridge. When it costs your entire paycheque just to get a roof over your head and food in your belly, it’s pretty hard to save enough money for retirement. This is made even harder when financial institutions pay close to zero interest on savings and investing has become fraught with so much volatility that you might as well go to the casino because the odds are similar. I expect that this comment is going to generate the usual responses from a few people who will say that it’s easy to get rich and those who aren’t just don’t work hard enough or they spend their money on lattes. But as a struggling senior who has had to return to work at the age of 70 just to afford to survive, I can tell you that you absolutely will need money to live on when you get old, and my suggestion is that you do whatever you can to put at least something aside. But you also need to enjoy the life you’ve got right now, so try to live simply in terms of material things (like not buying fancy furniture and so on), so that you spend whatever “disposable” income you have on experiences rather than belongings. Oh and it will help if you don’t have kids, because I did and they’ve cost me a fortune!

15 1Rating: +14

Anonymous

Jun 13, 2022 at 6:31am

Change seems to be a hard slow process my friend.
Maybe you wake up one morning and just jump into the abyss of this thing we call life again !
No questions asked, no over thinking things or analyzing it to death. You just do it !
I'm still on the fence about this question but I'm
getting so tired of being on the fence, it's quite a lonely place !
Look at me go Mom I'm flying again.
Wheeeeeeeee :)

4 1Rating: +3

I get it!

Jun 13, 2022 at 7:32am

I'm 40 plus, and have spent many years thinking about this... and what I have done is saved enough to do some insanely awesome travel for a handful of months each year, and pay bills and have money in the bank incase of emergencies, which have come up and I've financially been okay. But saving for retirement, no, that's not happened.

Will I get a pension, probably not, but I can say will all the conference in the world right now, ALL of it! That my travels over the last 20 plus years has made my life worth living in a way I could never describe. Seeing the world, (not taking a 2 week trip to an all inclusive) actually spending time in other countries, with locals etc opens your eyes to things you just can't imagine and gives you confidence that no matter what happens, you'll be okay. Live your life now, as you never know when you physically won't be able to anymore, you can always make more money!

14 2Rating: +12

My 2 cents

Jun 13, 2022 at 10:13am

I understand your dilemma. There is the drip of a regular pay cheque and predictable life. But then there's a pull to explore the unknown and find excitement and personal growth. While I can't tell you what to do, nor do I know anything about how much stability you've acquired and what you're willing to part with, I can tell you my story. After university, I took a full time job in a large well known company. It was stable, there was growth inside the ranks possible. But I was bored beyond belief. So I shipped myself halfway across the world teaching English in a country with a language I could neither read nor speak. It was a grand adventure. I then accumulated savings and traveled the world. I came back with literally nothing but a giant smile on my face and satisfaction that I could do literally anything on my own. Then reality sank in. I was behind in my peers, who had established themselves in their careers, got into partnerships, had children, starting buying homes, etc. I would have to say that my grand adventure set me back financially about 5-8 years compared with my peers. But I had done something so important for me, something that shapes me to this day: I have confidence that no one can match or ever take away from me.

You could wake yourself up with more tight parameters: ie. Limit your adventure to $3000/one year/2 new hobbies, etc., so that you can maintain some boundaries to operate in, so as not to lose your stability or financial situation. There's no need to jump in and risk it all, especially in this uncertain climate of runaway inflation, possible recession, etc. Baby steps is totally OK.

Yes, you WILL regret not doing anything when you're 80, because you already regret it now. When you're 80, you will be too tired, too old, and maybe too broke to attempt waking up as a human being.

11 4Rating: +7

Anonymous

Jun 13, 2022 at 10:33am

I once encountered a guy in his late 50s who lived with his Mom taking his first ever vacation on his own.

As a sad state of affairs its hard to beat.

6 3Rating: +3

Young people

Jun 14, 2022 at 1:10am

Shouldn't make assumptions about what being 80 + is like. I'm not too old or tired or broke to travel and neither are my friends.
Take your ignorant head out of your derriere.

7 3Rating: +4

@Young people

Jun 14, 2022 at 3:32pm

Some people are fit at 80, but sadly many aren't. My parents haven't been able to do much of anything in a decade. A person just doesn't know what life will throw at them, so they should have those adventures while they're young, but happy for you that you're still fit. Good on you.

8 3Rating: +5

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