Outliving others

I’m now at a point in my life where I’ve reached that stage of outliving friends, childhood friends, and my friend’s parents. Life takes on new meaning now. Literally my friend went on vacation, broke his back surfing, came back a paraplegic and then died. I’m a space cadet and my mind is preoccupied and not present. I’m forgetting basics, my mind scattered. A woman yelled at me in a public washroom because I forgot to flush the toilet before she entered the stall. I apologized immediately and felt embarrassed. Try not to blow up when you perceive you’ve been wronged. Maybe people are thinking about someone’s fatal concussion or throat cancer and are preoccupied. Life can literally end tomorrow and there’s nothing you can do about it. It’s scary and sobering.

18 Comments

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You speak the truth…

Jun 28, 2022 at 12:31am

Thanks for the reminder!

5 1Rating: +4

We all die sometime

Jun 28, 2022 at 12:47am

As you already know, the number of people older than you never gets any larger than it is today.

2 2Rating: 0

Anonymous

Jun 28, 2022 at 2:57am

I'm sorry for your losses. Take as much time as you need. Compassion for fellow human and what they may be experiencing seems nearing end of days. I fear the majority of people are on auto-pilot, blinders up, their way or the highway, until the end of time, sadly missing the big picture.

17 1Rating: +16

Anonymous

Jun 28, 2022 at 2:59am

Get busy living or get busy dying ― Stephen King

7 4Rating: +3

Anonymous

Jun 28, 2022 at 7:39am

Be kind to yourself. Give the space you need to process the losses and grieve.

8 1Rating: +7

Anonymous

Jun 28, 2022 at 1:16pm

It is sobering, yes. When people I've known pass on, it's also comes as a reminder to live as fully as is possible. When you can physically sense the space where they used to stand, it's hardest, though I've used it as a reminder to enjoy and appreciate as best I can. We don't know day by day what may come but if I allowed myself to be in fear about it, it would colour those days to more muted than they might have been. I guess the 'scary' is there for you but maybe not letting it lead might take the edge off of how you are feeling?

My Mom (who isn't actually very advance in years) has had many friends and relatives die, along with one husband and one sibling (soon to be 2) pass on. She renewed her passport a while ago and while looking at her photo wondered out loud "I wonder if this is the last passport I'll ever need in this life." It wasn't morbid. Very small things can bring Life's preciousness into focus.

I agree with you too, giving people the benefit of the doubt would go a long way towards creating a more civil and peaceful society. You never know what someone is grappling with, or the medication they are trying to adjust to, or the news they may have recently received, or the enormous decision that they need to make. Life is always in process - ever moving, and practising patience with ourselves and others helps a bunch " )

13 1Rating: +12

Robert Zimmerman

Jun 28, 2022 at 2:25pm

'He who is not busy being born is busy dieing'
- Bob Dylan
Steven King is a hack.

6 6Rating: 0

I'm now in my mid-70s

Jun 28, 2022 at 4:19pm

And I'm learning there are three things to remember about growing old: 1) It's natural for many of us to have cognition problems and become forgetful, and 2) What were we just talking about ? :-)

9 1Rating: +8

@Robert Zimmerman

Jun 28, 2022 at 6:54pm

He largely is, but the Shawshank Redemption was a great movie. Remember, the context of that line was the prison wisdom of the character Red, played by Morgan Freeman.

6 1Rating: +5

Dr. Real

Jun 28, 2022 at 7:08pm

Life is short, so if you're not out there, leaving a legacy of, making he world a better place? Then what are you doing? Because I do therefore I will leave this earth with zero regrets by being the answer to others prayers. Give it a try...

7 5Rating: +2

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