Highly Selective

I've become increasingly selective about who I will keep in my life. I have way fewer relationships than I used to, but they are much more satisfying. I no longer tolerate a lot of behaviours socially, and I am left only with people who truly value me. This includes family! Waste my time regularly? Bigoted? Take advantage of those with less than you? Ignore my clear boundaries? Bye. I've been told that I'm harsh for being willing to cut people off easily. I see it more as saving us both time, as I'm never going to be compatible with that person and will never be happy with our relationship. Not putting up with people because I "should" is the most empowering thing I've ever done.

20 Comments

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huh

Aug 8, 2022 at 4:34pm

If only you were highly selective with what you eat though

Anonymous

Aug 8, 2022 at 4:50pm

This resonates so much with me. I see the world as it is, and not the way I wish it to be.

7 2Rating: +5

Onus

Aug 8, 2022 at 5:21pm

Some people expect unreasonable things from you just because you know them. Friendship requires more than that!

14 1Rating: +13

Gee, what an epiphany...

Aug 8, 2022 at 6:57pm

Most people do.

5 4Rating: +1

Me too OP!

Aug 8, 2022 at 6:58pm

I had a lot of relationships where my friends would just talk about what their other friends were doing, or complain ad nauseam about their job or bad relationship, but never make a positive change, although I let it happen, so it's my fault too.
Now when I see my newer friends we discuss ideas, bring people together to chat about how we can do better for the world and ourselves. <--- This totally sounds like some kind of group that "reads that old book" but it's not

14 1Rating: +13

Well said

Aug 8, 2022 at 8:08pm

It's good to create healthy boundaries out of self respect so that no one will try to play you for a fool. Forget about the idiots and move on. There nothing more refreshing than turning the page and starting over.

14 1Rating: +13

Blah blah f’ing blah

Aug 8, 2022 at 9:04pm

Yet another “confession” bragging about dumping people from their life. This has become such a fad nowadays. People have zero tolerance for anything or anyone that doesn’t immediately fit into their very narrow “boundaries”. That’s all well and good until you find yourself alone because you’ve eliminated anyone who disagreed with you, talked about something you didn’t find interesting, or otherwise annoyed you. I’m sure you’re all exceptionally fascinating and perfect yourselves though so you shouldn’t be lacking in any friends. Good luck with that.

Ex-People Pleaser

Aug 8, 2022 at 11:42pm

Yes if I had realized people never cared about me and I didn't need to care about them a lot sooner I could have saved myself a lot of heartbreak. It's funny the way the tables turn to being called selfish when they can't leech and prey :)

Peace is more valuable than fake people any day.

23 1Rating: +22

Re: huh

Aug 9, 2022 at 12:10am

How do you know what the OP ate for breakfast?

6 11Rating: -5

@Blah blah

Aug 9, 2022 at 2:50am

No, you likely read with your very narrow lens. I'm guessing you can't push others around anymore the way you used to eh? Try treating people the way you want to be treated and maybe you won't miss out on relationships.

16 4Rating: +12

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