Well, at least I tried?
posted January 12th, 2023 at 7:29 PM
What is WRONG with single humans in this town? Dating is challenging and really disappointing. Lets' do the math: The last 8 weeks on FB dating: 25 matches - yay! 12 actually responding after we match 9 follow through with a conversation beyond a "hi" or "hey" 2 want me to migrate over to whats app and buy crypto (block/delete) 3 want me to send them nakkid pics (NOPE!) 1 sends me a nakkid pic of his privates unsolicited (block/delete) 2 move offline to old school phone calls.. several phone calls late into the evening - get along well - yay! 1 says he will make me the best food I will ever have - plans a date, does not pick a time/place/date..disappears day of date.... re-appears 3 days later but blames me for making him chose a place to meet and says he forgot... then maybe he should just come to my house and get naked for the first date? (block/delete) 1 sends a text after 10pm asking me to meet up for a drink at his house (we have NEVER met) NOPE - don't wanna get murdered. Back to zero again. Delete dating apps. resign myself to a solo life again.
7 CommentsPost a Comment
Jan 17, 2023 at 12:56pm
getting real means meeting people face to face in a social setting even the library. anything but souless online dating. it's a loser magnet.
Jan 17, 2023 at 1:08pm
There have been multiple articles written about the challenges on Vancouver's dating scene, and they have all concluded that people here are capricious and or selfish. It's never going to change, I recommend OK Cupid and finding love in another city or country.
Skip to my love
Jan 17, 2023 at 8:05pm
Join a dance class, and attend Meetup events that do activities you're interested in. Meet people. Be willing to be yourself and seek those you identify with. I find dating rarely elicits connection but the pressure to perform with expectations for fast-tracked intimacy. Like gasoline on a fire, it dooms things to burn out. Seeing people on a regular basis in a neutral environment allows an opportunity for kindling to catch and grow into a stable flame when steadily fed.
I can relate
Jan 17, 2023 at 9:40pm
I've tried to meet people online over the years and I've had experiences very similar to yours. Someone would contact me and when I wrote back I'd never hear back from them. Sometimes we'd chat/flirt back and forth a bit and then they'd ghost me. So weird. Some of the people I contacted ended up being seriously unhinged and awful. Many of them just wanted to come over for a one-night-stand. As you say, block/delete because I don't want to get murdered. There are a lot of shitty, disgusting men here.
But... there are good, decent, normal men here too. They don't look like movie stars though, and many are underemployed. They are invisible to women and they get ignored. Men know that most women tend to "date/marry up or sideways" which means that they don't want a man who struggles financially and makes less money than they do. So, a lot of men have given up on initiating contact because they know they'll just get shot down. The small pool of Prince Charming types are either all players or they're already taken by other women.
So, that's why you're having such a hard time OP: you're stuck with the undesirable leftovers. I don't know what the solution is here. If you don't look like a bombshell, I don't think you're going to get the 6-6-6 guy you're dreaming about and will indeed have to resign yourself to solitude like many of us have.
you got matched
Jan 18, 2023 at 8:11pm
Now imagine what guys go through, there is no way we match at that level or even interact. So I guess there is that. Women just want to shop, and are always looking for a better deal. Online dating is absolutely the worst, learned that very quick. It is the world we've created, looking for shortcuts.
@Skip to my love
Jan 20, 2023 at 7:23am
That's so well said, I agree completely
@I can relate
Jan 22, 2023 at 8:38am
I can relate, too. I have a history of being bullied by Prince Charming, so I stay away. I have approached the quiet guy in the corner. Some reciprocated my interest until I asked them out on a date, after which they reject me with, "oh no, you're nice, but...no, no..." Some enthusiastically asked me about my availability, but stayed silent when I made attempts at innocent conversation. And sometimes the conversation is...incompatible. Maybe I'm just weird (given my track record of being bullied by co-workers when I'm just trying to mind my own business).
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