If it's true, your example is a bit extreme. But in all honesty it can be hard to distinguish between the creeps and non-creeps, so it feels necessary to self protect. A lot of times I'll be flirting with a guy and all of a sudden he'll turn the conversation to "let's go somewhere and bang". No talk of dinner, a walk on the beach or good conversation. It just becomes easier to avoid eye contact and not speak.

I agree about the picnic. If we are all as awesome as we say we are, let's prove it to each other!

I also completely agree with Natty about the creeps. Safety is a big concerns and there are some crazies in this town (as with any city). Personally, maybe I've been lucky that the men who approach me have been respectful (and no, nothing materialized beyond a nice conversation).

OMG, I agree with Natty. I tried to just chat with guys when I would go out amongst friends with the idea in mind that I would just get to know people better in this city and I have had similar experiences - they laugh with you all evening, tell you your so smart and funny, stay a little longer because "they so enjoy your company" and then they slip in this passive aggressive invite back to their place or your place. It is kind of a downer. I had one guy physically push me into a corner and attempt to have his way with me. Luckily a cab driver saw what was going down and made a quick u-turn to take me home. He said he has seen it so many times, he knew what to do. Now that really sucks. Now before I get attacked here - I have seen both sides of the coin. I have watched some pretty bad female behaviour as well so the sexes have to start respecting those who wish to be respected. I'm sorry to the nice genuine men out there but where are you really?

@Natty & @Hey.....
I'm sorry to hear that the two of you had such bad experiences with the intent of just having fun conversations/light flirting. I had no idea that there were so many predator types roaming in this city (been here only 2 years and definitely not my style). What worries me most is that if there are guys constantly going for the "straight-to-bed" approach that either means: a) they've got some really f*%#ed up mentors and/or b) the technique worked at some point & time which has completely skewered their perception of dating and women. If I were female I would most likely swear off dating in this city altogether. Then again, I'm male and have already sworn off dating here anyway...

@Picnic on
I figured if we got enough of the core people from here for a gathering that should be enough to filter out any of the sleezebags & creepers since most of the contributors/commentors seem to show a decent amount of sanity. At the minimum I will build a makeshift psychiatry booth and sit around all day to see who actually shows up to listen to their qualms ("The doctor is in" sign included).

This isn't the first comment about setting up a meet and greet.

Somebody should take the bull by the horns and set up a Meet Up group. While it's hard to weed out the weirdos, if we have enough nice people from here who are like-minded, we might be able to 'protect' each other and edge the creeps out.

I'm not volunteering as I live out in the 'burb's, but I'd suggest starting off by setting up the Meet Up group, and then posting it here in Confessions, and also in the "I Saw You" section.

I think you'd have a lot of takers - and we all have at least two things in common (single, and Confessions).

Are you the one who wrote that latest confession for a meet-and-greet??

I live way out in the burbs too (we are cursed). Then again it makes you wonder how many of us are in the burbs...

I'm a Burbhead.

Weather is looking for this weekend. I wonder how next weekend would work out.

Now to think of someplace "burb-friendly" and near transit so we can amass all readers from across greater burbland.....or just make separate meet-ups?

@OP - yes, I posted that confession and then never came back here to see the other comments. There's a new Meetup group for Vancouver Singles 30s to 50s - created about the time I posted that, so I wondered if it might be a fellow Confessions reader. I signed up - maybe you should look into it to - and also @Hey.... Then maybe we Burbheads can meet and take it from there (or at least carpool to events....)