Confessions

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Weird Belly Fetish

I'm not generally attracted to overweight women. I'm not trying to shame here, but it just doesn't do anything for me. I'm also not typically turned on by skinny women. But a skinny woman with a bit of a belly... the rarest of combinations. The frog girl hotty... WOW. I guess we can't choose what makes the fireworks.

Lost Job

My boyfriend lost his job yesterday and I don't know if we can go on. The bills are going to start piling up and its not fair for me to have to pay them all. I don't even think I can pay them all. Were struggling to make ends meet. I am going to move back in with my mom and dad.

Back the eff off

I wish people could read the room and follow my lead. Instead, they push, tirelessly and relentlessly: asking for photos of my family life, asking for my social channel handles, asking for me to check something at my home for them, asking where my parents were from. These are virtual strangers or coworkers who I maintain strict boundaries with. I don’t ask anything about them. I am only here to pay the bills, do my workout at the gym, etc. Here for my reason only. Not here for you in any way:shape/form. They look and ask about the brand of food on my desk. I never even go to their desk and don’t care about any of their food/consumption pattern etc. I have zero interest in you and you pushing will not ever make me interested in you. Leave the hermit crabs alone, even if they’re forced to work at the same office address as you. I asked one of them, after they waited to leave the office at the same time as me, Why are you so interested in me? They finally got the hint. It’s weird how when you are not interested in people, how it brings out this crazed desperation in them.

Just a matter of When, not "If"

I have this problem of climate anxiety. I love this warm, sunny weather like most people and do the things I enjoy in this summer-like temperature. But I have this feeling of waiting for the other shoe to drop, of impending doom, knowing that this warm, dry weather, will likely lead to explosive wildfires affecting Southern BC soon. It's already happening in Nova Scotia, Northern BC, Alberta. And it just a matter of time when California, Oregon, Washington and BC get shrouded in grey like it has in past summers. Weeks on end of smoky skies, red fireball sunsets, that burning feeling in my eyes and that film on my skin. I feel a crushing sadness when I see flames shooting out of the forests and trees in the news. Everyone's all out there and enjoying life, but I feel uneasy and unsure and maybe I should just stick my head in the sand like everyone else, and not change, not care, just drive around aimlessly in a car, it's sunny and who cares about tomorrow.

My Past

I came to the realization recently that I have a lot of stuff filling up my life, books records, knickknacks, things that represent a past I no longer live in and probably will never revisit again. Why do I keep this stuff, in case I get nostalgic in my old age? Do I really need to hold on to that stuffy an ex, who hasn't been my life for 20 years, gave me? That Midnight Oil CD that's collecting dust on the shelf? There's just so much of it, I don't know where to begin. And no, don't mention Marie Kondo, I find her annoying. Let the great purge begin!

There is good in the world

I've been struggling so much lately. Mentally, physically (messed up ankle and foot) and financially. Nightmare neighbor's new girlfriend banging on the wall when my kid makes the slightest noise.. she's autistic and stims vocally often. I'm feeling uncomfortable in my own home all while just trying to make it through every month being a single mom, getting my daughter to therapy, going to food banks etc. and I've just hit my limit. Today the wheel on my child's stroller blew. The entire thing. Walking is our main way of getting around as I don't drive and get panic attacks on transit. I had to hobble on my bad ankle, while lifting the one side of the stroller nearly ten blocks to the gas station as at first I thought it only needed air. Once we got there and filled it with air, it immediately deflated. I felt so defeated. A man helped me figure out the issue which was the valve so I couldn't even just patch the wheel. I was kind of thinking out loud and said oh great, I can't afford that right now. He said sorry, can't help you there unfortunately. I was immediately embarrassed and apologized saying I wasn't hinting for him to give me money. I bought tape from the store to try and cover the valve after pumping more air in to try and at least get us home. As I looked up from the air pump he walked up to me and handed me $15.00 saying you need this more than I do. I immediately burst into tears and thanked him. I probably looked crazy. I was so overwhelmed not just over the money but mostly because of this man's kindness. I really, really needed that. I've been having such bad luck and crappy things in life lately that this man's one act of kindness alone made me sob. My faith in humanity was restored today. Another couple stopped to ask if we needed help as well. There are good people in the world. He will probably never know how deeply that touched me today. If you happen to ever read this, Thank you.. from the bottom of my heart. You completely made my day. I will pay it forward to someone else down on their luck someday.

30 years now

I confess I have had it with the NHL. Tired of the ever increasing ads on the rink boards and glass targeting the local viewing market. I used to enjoy seeing the permanent ads from other cities which gave a feel for their own companies. Now these stupid ads are flashing and changing via virtual technology and it is so distracting I don't enjoy the game anymore. Too many commercial breaks and inserts. Waaaaay tooo many gambling commercials. 30 years of no Canadian team winning the Stanley cup, 30 years of Bettman NHL with dumb shoot outs and 3 on 3's. No thanks! I'd rather knit something than waste my time on this boring, predictable monetized soap opera.

Kryptonite for men

If you want to see an obnoxious and obviously fragile man lose his shit: ignore them and ignore their ‘advice’. When faced with someone who doesnt care what they say or even worse: someone who disagrees with them, they will melt like snowflakes and lose it. LOLOLOLOL. ITS REALLY FUN TRY IT!!!!! This works best against guys who fancy themselves as ‘edgy’ or ‘based’. These guys think very highly of themselves and think they are a gods gift to the world. In other words: losers.

Dogs

You know I think every person in Vancouver should get at least two dogs then there would be even more shit and piss everywhere. You may think your picking up your dog's shit like good citizens but what about the runny shit you can't possibly scrape that all up with your little, tiny, thin doggie bags and you don't ! Cause I hit some on the grass today so thanks for that ! Almost puked .

In Love

I met this guy and went back to my place and he was amazing in bed. I orgasmed about 20 times in one night. Now he wants to meet up again and am I stupid for thinking he isn't sleeping with other women? Could he just only be sleeping with me? I am starting to fall for this man.

I SAW YOU

a long time ago

We met at Trinity B.C. you asked me a question about forgiveness and I gave you an answer which...