Confessions

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Not allowed

to like my body, to feel comfortable in my own body, to want sex, to have sex, to enjoy sex, because of a strict conservative upbringing. Not wanting to burn in hell. People make fun of these beliefs but when you grow up in it, it's very difficult. I feel so disconnected from my own body. It's very strange. I want to deprogram myself but don't know how.

I bought

a fleshlight. Odd how people are "comfortable" talking about the use of dildos but when it comes fleshlights, all of a sudden there's a bit of a cringe factor.

Replaceable

Despite all the talk about how community and friends is what makes life livable I am constantly surprised how flakey people are and how disposable offers of connection are. Treat others as you want to be treated. If you agreed to spend time with people, stick to it. If you’re too busy say it when you’re being invited.

Change for the better

I’m done with all these lame chain restaurants like Denny’s, Boston Pizza, Earls, Cactus Club and so on etc. They’re all pretty much the same song and dance: mediocre food and lousy service. I need to find a new place to eat.

Highly Selective

I've become increasingly selective about who I will keep in my life. I have way fewer relationships than I used to, but they are much more satisfying. I no longer tolerate a lot of behaviours socially, and I am left only with people who truly value me. This includes family! Waste my time regularly? Bigoted? Take advantage of those with less than you? Ignore my clear boundaries? Bye. I've been told that I'm harsh for being willing to cut people off easily. I see it more as saving us both time, as I'm never going to be compatible with that person and will never be happy with our relationship. Not putting up with people because I "should" is the most empowering thing I've ever done.

I follow my friends' only fans

I've been following her onlyfans for months and I've seen her naked, masturbating and other stuff and I feel horrible but I can't stop, she doesn't know I do

The Watering Hole

Years ago I spent a lot of time at this place. There were regulars and the music playing had a particular sound. There’s a way people dress when you go and everyone speaks a similar way. I’d drink what the patrons were having and talk about spirits. It felt like my whole life was there. And then I just…stopped going. Now when I am exposed to anything that has the faintest whiff of that place I get the heebie-jeebies. What I see looking in from the outside of those memories scares me and I will never go back to church.

I SAW YOU

ferry to mayne island

You asked for directions to the Mayne island ferry departure area and I was on my way to Galiano....

SAVAGE LOVE

Dan Savage: That husband over there

A woman asks Dan for advice on encouraging her husband to have an anonymous encounter with another woman.