Confessions

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The Joy of Swearing

I love to swear. I like to arrange as many offensive words together like a verbal strand of pearls born from the irritating moments of my day. Alliteration is key, and being able to paint a picture. Throwing in unexpected ideas or words into the mix is fun. Unfortunately I have to keep it to myself as I’ve yet to find a group of people who feel the same way.

I hate being

a human. I hate this seething cess pool of debauchery, chaos, unkindness, filth and pollution. I hate how cruel people are to each other. I don’t want to be part of this anymore. What is the point of having material things when money can’t change the fact that everyone is so mean and petty and in the end it’s all meaningless?

In Love

I am madly in love with my coworker. I am so attracted to her personality, her smile, her eyes and her sense of humour. She is incredibly beautiful but she doesn't flaunt it even though she is breathtakingly gorgeous. I think about her all the time and wish we could be together!

It’ll be okay

Amy I a shitty person for liking a guy who has a girlfriend? I would never do anything about it, as it seems like they have a great relationship. I saw him the other day unexpectedly and realized I still liked him. If we’re meant to be in the future that would be nice. If not, that’s okay too. I’m happy for them. Mostly!

Social media addiction/distraction?

My brother deleted his Facebook & Instagram because he said they were too distracting....yet now he spends everyday looking in the Georgia Straight Confessions & I Saw You's.....how Ironic.

Someone Else's Job

I'm unable to tell a good friend why the clientele doesn't like his business.

Lightbulb moment!

I recently realized that this person I tried (and failed) to have a normal relationship with is very likely on the spectrum. Once I started thinking about their inability to relate to a lot of what’s considered normal human emotions the puzzle pieces started to come together. They’ve never had a long term relationship with anyone except their family, so it makes sense if I think of it that way. Otherwise they just seem so cold and insensitive, so thinking of them as being undiagnosed but on the spectrum makes it easier to have some empathy for them even though they don’t have any for anyone else.

Broken Thermostat

I have no chill whatsoever. It’s maddening. I wish that very little phased me, but most of it does. I mentally freeze up often and suddenly everything feels too warm. Speaking up becomes useless as my entire vocabulary decides to have a fire drill and vacate my mind. I wish I could be calm, collected. And I’m not.

Confused and heartbroken

I’ve been in a marriage for six years. My partner who was mentally amazing and stayed by me through my illnesses (both physical and mental) for years, is now mentally ill. It’s been horrible. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been yelled at. He’s starting to do the work but it’s been so hard. We’ve had many hardships that would make anyone depressed, but it also really got worse with the pandemic. Some days I feel like the strongest person ever for being a partner through thick and very thin, and sometimes I feel like a total idiot for staying. The yelling has become less and they end up sobbing in my arms after. I am just so so very tired. Anyone been through a bad depressive episode to make it through the other side? He started CBT therapy, and we know antidepressants are an option. I’m just also scared of antidepressants because five out of my eight closest friends are on them and aren’t doing much better. Depression seems like the next pandemic.

Intentions

Some people aren’t honest about their true feelings or intentions about other people. Sometimes they don’t even know what they are themselves. So when I ask what your intention was in saying or doing something, maybe I’m not just asking for my own sake but also for yours. If you can’t be honest with me, at least be honest with yourself. Once you’ve mastered that concept it’s very freeing. It’s being authentic, which for some people is a foreign concept.

I SAW YOU

Lo with our bikes on the Seabus Saturday...

This Saturday morning we both got on the Seabus headed to Waterfront. You had a well equipped and...