Confessions

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Bad Choices

So many women are having babies they can't afford. I just don't understand the thinking. I mean three kids with no job and no man to pay the bills. You would think after one or two they would clue in but lets go for 3 or 4. I have no problem with women having sex with lots of men. Just do it in a responsible way with contraceptives. I am not slut shaming anyone I just think you should have kids only if you can afford to raise them.

Not Settling

I am a good person and I deserve love in my life. Its hard dating in the city. Most men are only after one thing and once they get it they disappear. My friends and I are all beautiful, intelligent, hard working, and accomplished people yet we're all single. I will not settle for anyone who doesn't light my soul on fire.

I confess that sobriety is awesome

For years I was frequently falling off the wagon and then a different mental approach helped me. I used to want to "reward" myself with a drink after a lengthy stretch of being sober and you know what happens next: horrible bender, days of being violently ill and feeling shame afterwards. So now when the "reward" idea pops into my brain, I think of the "consequences" and the reward idea doesn't seem so great. And the thing is, being sober feels so much better both physically and especially mentally. Feeling very grateful these days.

It's hard being a survivor in the #metoo era

On one hand I'm happy people are being held accountable for their actions and I'm glad there's now a discussion on sexual assault, it's long overdue. But on the other hand you can never seem to get away from the painful reminders. You can't sit on the bus without seeing an ad for some sort of helpline, you can't read the news without seeing a headline related to the topic, you can't get away from people talking about highly publicized cases etc.. the list goes on. I'm coming up to the anniversary of my own rape, I'm counting years now and I have to say this is the hardest year. It's so easy to relive trauma through other people. I was one of the very few people that reported. Something inside you dies after rape but something dies again when you get the courage to report but end up being told there isn't much that can be done because it's nothing more then a 'she said he said' case. The world changed for me that day. I knew what happened to me, my scumbag ex knew what happened to me, even the fucking cop believed me but charges would just be impossible. I don't regret reporting though because there was measures put in place to make sure I'm safe, but to all the people that chose not to say anything - you did not make a wrong decision. It was a truly humiliating experience. I probably would have killed myself if I didn't have a good therapist at the time. So to all you other survivors out there - walk bravely. And remember you don't owe anyone your story.

It's hard being a survivor in the #metoo era

On one hand I'm happy people are being held accountable for their actions and I'm glad there's now a discussion on sexual assault, it's long overdue. But on the other hand you can never seem to get away from the painful reminders. You can't sit on the bus without seeing an ad for some sort of helpline, you can't read the news without seeing a headline related to the topic, you can't get away from people talking about highly publicized cases etc.. the list goes on. I'm coming up to the anniversary of my own rape, I'm counting years now and I have to say this is the hardest year. It's so easy to relive trauma through other people. I was one of the very few people that reported. Something inside you dies after rape but something dies again when you get the courage to report but end up being told there isn't much that can be done because it's nothing more then a 'she said he said' case. The world changed for me that day. I knew what happened to me, my scumbag ex knew what happened to me, even the fucking cop believed me but charges would just be impossible. I don't regret reporting though because there was measures put in place to make sure I'm safe, but to all the people that chose not to say anything - you did not make a wrong decision. It was a truly humiliating experience. I probably would have killed myself if I didn't have a good therapist at the time. So to all you other survivors out there - walk bravely. And remember you don't owe anyone your story.

Oh Right

This is the week of jackasses with firecrackers.

Hey, Polly piss everywhere

To all those female squarters, hoverers, and seat standers, the toilet seats are dirty because you are pissing all over them! Please, either clean up after yourself or get a litter box...

Okie doke. I'm open-minded

I would be okay if we made a fortress North America that was cut away from the world. I like borders. I would be happy living in my country and doing my other thing, while the rest of the world enjoys their own principles, ideas, and over-population.

I groped spiderman in front of my kids.

I was out Halloween downtown with my family,and saw a guy who was dressed Spiderman. Oh my freakin god Spiderman had a butt. People actually were catcalling this guy. We posed for a photo and I couldn't help but feel him up a bit. (I did ask him if I could put my hands on his waist area) I realized the little ones next to me saw what I did and now I'm wondering if they can ever watch a spiderman show without that image in their head. Sorry kids,but mom has never seen a guy with a butt like that.

Anyone who pays for a ticket at the Biltmore

I'll start this by saying that I'm old, in my 40's. But, holy shit, every single time I've come here to see an artist (tonight was Ty Segall), why the goddamned hell are people paying upwards of $30 to TALK AND TAKE PICTURES THE ENTIRE TIME, especially for a solo acoustic show?! You're not a fucking "influencer", you're not making money from your Insta-story, you're literally broadcasting the fact that you ARE NOT IN THE MOMENT by "sharing" every single goddamned song with I guess what you believe are legions of adoring fans...? Jesus Christ. And the people who talk at these shows are even worse. If you want to talk, go the fuck to a bar, how insulting to an artist to have all of these lovely small quiet moments they create be ruined by your goddamned talking and laughing and shitty bar talk. I'll continue to take my money elsewhere; smart artists have promoters who decline venues like Biltmore and Fortune for this exact reason. Ty's did him a disservice by letting the likes of you purchase tickets. Have fun building your fake-internet empires, Gen Z! I'll be smug in 20 years when you complain about the *exact same thing* of generations behind you.

Cardio

very thoughtful of Trankslink getting people in shape because none of the Skytrain station escalators work

Why

does my female colleague shove her phone at me showing me pictures where she’s dressed like a whore on the weekends? For the record, I’m female too. Is it vanity, is she looking for affirmation, comments? She dresses work appropriate so is this her version of cutting loose? It’s like we’re having a regular conversation about our day, and then boom, prostitute pictures. I guess my only comment for GS is that I find it sad that her pastime is wanting to dress up like a whore, not learn a programming language, not running, not anything remotely non-male gaze focussed.

hallowe'en costumes mandatory at work

got a call from my boss at closing time last night telling me I am expected to show up to work today wearing a costume. WTF? I told her I didn't have anything on hand...Why should I spend my off hours running around trying to put a costume together...spending money on crap? If an employer expects you to dress up for hallowe'en perhaps they can give you advance notice, supply a budget or rent a costume for you. Not showing up in costume. sorry.

Smokers

I hope smokers who ignorantly toss butts out the car window or ontothe street die of mouth cancer

Craft a Dream

In my dreams I craft a world where you are tortured all day every day. You are left. Alone. With nothing and no one. You phone but they do not answer. You text but they do not answer. You beg and plead for their attention but no one, nobody gives a shit about You.

I SAW YOU

Adanac bike path, 8PM Tuesday

It was a dark night, but I saw you. Your bike had no lights, but I saw you. You wore a black...

SAVAGE LOVE

Savage Love: How to find safe and kinky partners

"I’ve always wanted to tie girls up, but I can never convince a woman to let me."