A crush at my work asked me out a few months ago, and after a few dates things have been seemingly good. The thing is, I worked with her for years. I always defined her as out of my league by a long shot. For the most part, working with her lived up to that. She's had two finances in the time I've known her and both were dudes way better than me. Coming straight from the gym, jacked up, perfectly groomed, expensive trucks, etc. Over the pandemic and after it ended our employment went through a lot of purging and deficits and lot of people who were higher up than me have spent years bitching and been depressed. I am a bottom rung type of employee. I am chipper as hell, and genuine. That's never mattered in my 40+ years. I assumed I was just a rebound or fling for this woman, and I'd have been happy with that, but apparently a relentless positive attitude for a decade plus has made more of an impact on her. I have had addiction issues more than once, owned them and kept going. She mentioned on our last date, she knows my f*ck ups and addictions, and she knows when I fall how I am. Her phone kept going off the last date and rather than look at it privately she stated point "I like you," she then put the phone on the table and slid it over and said "you can read what my clingy ex is saying." I didn't bother to read it. I slid the phone back. She smiled and we went about our dinner.

she doesn't seem to care much. She speculated that it is lust. I told her lust is a part of love. the truth is , I love the way i feel when shes around. i want to be near her always. Sure, she happens to be georgeous but I think if she wasn't so gorgeous she'd realize that yes, I do in fact love her. I wish people would take me at my word. I don't lie. I despise liars, you can't trust them at all. I trust myself.

Or in his case, it was a jar of keys. Same thing I guess, because I can only imagine how many women gave him their heart along with their key. Artifacts, I called them. The saddest thing is that he really didn’t clue in that it wouldn’t always be that easy to keep collecting either. He claims to be happy, but I can see right through him as usual and he’s got a bewildered and mildly desperate look in his eyes now. I used to hope that my love would be enough to break the pattern, but now I know that with some people, nothing is ever going to be enough. They’re addicted to looking for something better right around the corner and they’ve always got one foot out the door. Just like I learned to live half a life when I was with him, I’ve finally learned to live my whole life without him. “Who do you think you are, running ‘round leaving scars?”

And I don't regret a single one.

I worry more about the well being of celebrities then for people who are actually vulnerable

I have been suffering constant telepathy FOREVER. Some people think it's mental health, some people think it's spiritual, but I know it's caused by photographs on a string. I don't know the trick exactly, but does anyone know how to make it stop? I've heard of this referred to as vampires, the organization, the company, blah blah blah, but there has got to be away, equally simple to stop this constant junk im being forced to listen to. Brave up and help a human out

Someone I used to work with started a Go Fund Me for her cat. She earns good money and just bought an apartment with her fiancé. Shit. I live in a basement suite! I'd love a cat. Go Fund Me would be a last resort for me though. Already at 1 / 10 of the goal though. It's impossible to keep up with the Jones and Joneses'. It's hard to keep feeling optimistic and happy about life when cats get more attention than you do.

My fiend received a bit of good news the other day that his stocks went up. He had like a 3K share investment in a small bottled water company for a long time that never really went anywhere and now his 3K is worth 11K overnight. If a company like Coke buys them out he could end up with millions. I've never tried or learned how to do anything on the stock market but I think I'd like to try buying some shares of something but not spend too much.

I didn’t catch up on the eclipse today. Didn’t even notice anything happening outside. For some reason, it just doesn’t do it for me. None of these things capture my interest or make me want to orgasm.

It seems that every 30 years of so, the youth of today rise up in artistic revolution. I was a kid in the 90's, my mom in the 60's, my grandma in the 30's. Well, it's the 20's and we're right on track. The youth of recent went through something none of us olds will know what it's like. Isolation in ones formative years will create pain for some, but it will also bring some sort of youthful artist revolution. I am excited to see what they do. When I was a young peep, NWA and Nirvana were opposites, and equally revolutionary. The early days of internet made art go global and the implosion was a beautiful spectacle of a generation. I am excited to see where this generation goes and what they dance to.