The only thing that really bothers me in life is that I can't personally, physically thank any musician, artist or anyone who has had a profound affect on my life.
I have been randomly stumbling into relationships, and inevitably rage-quitting after a few months or a year, for about 7 years now. How do long-term daters do it?
leave vancouver as soon as this pandemic situation is over and I can finally travel. Stuck at my parents house and can’t believe how long this has dragged on. Holy f-ing shit!!!!!!!
I've been in a deep depression for years. Life has been a mess. I had blamed everyone else for my problems yet done nothing about it - everything I hated in a person. I met a man in 2018. I fell pregnant and we got married. As I write the true facts of these events I wonder if I'm being dramatic but friends and family remind me how bad it really was. I blamed myself for not having dinner ready for him after work every day which irritated him. He physically assaulted me so I left him. My daughter has just seen a pediatrician who strongly suspects that she is on the spectrum. We're on a wait list for an official diagnosis but it takes over a year. The diagnosis is important because it means we can have some treatment covered. Being a single mom I can't afford to pay privately. I cried when I heard the doctor's opinion but now have educated myself. There is nothing wrong with autism. If anything, it makes her interesting. She is hilarious. I love how when people say hi to her she looks at them like they're idiots. I know that's awful to say but I've wondered at times if she's on the spectrum or just doesn't give a crap. Either way she cracks me up and I love her from the bottom of my heart. I had been diagnosed with kidney problems which I had a pity party over. Yesterday a major shift happened. It felt like the sun came up for the first time in a million years. I cleaned my place so well you could eat off any surface. My body didn't feel like it was falling apart. My face had colour. I stepped outside the door to inhale the spring air. I looked up at the sky and thought to myself I'm so happy to be alive. I've lived through many things and will to be able to help my daughter through life which is something I never had. I feel happy for once in a very long time. I can't wait for my girl to get up so we can head to the park. I had my kidneys retested and found out yesterday that they're back up to 90%. Life is beautiful and change has come.
...and I don't know, man. I just don't know.
I can't enjoy my apartment because I am overly paranoid about making noise. My neighbours watch movies, play music, etc regularly. I just can't do the same, I don't know what's wrong with me. The thought of them hearing my movies or music is too much. I don't want to bother anyone, but also I don't want them to know what music I like. I tiptoe around even though they are stompers, above and below. I realize this makes no sense, I am basically the quietest neighbour possible, but I still feel like I am bothering people. I don't know what's wrong with me, I pay a fortune for an apartment that I can't even enjoy.
I am cooking basic traditional foods from all over the world. That's how I am surviving this pandemic. Watching YouTube, the new boob tube, gets me thinking about how bad foodie culture is though. It's so plastic. All you need is expensive cookware and an expensive kitchen with natural lighting through big fancy windows... and you can suck at cooking all you want. It will still get clicks. Foodies eat with their eyes and hardly at all with their mouths. Shame on them. I hope foodies smarten up... find their soul again.
who can/will get an old xbox game to work on my 360 e.
Guy or Girl or -----
Just REALLY wanna play Scaler(!!!)
(& forget my mom's gone):
My boyfriend has the unfortunate habit of only being able to tell me that he loves me when he’s drunk. The other unfortunate habit is that when he’s drunk he also says things like this: “I love you baby, in spite of who you are.” Or, “I love you even though you make terrible decisions and you’re so messed up.” If it wasn’t so pathetic I’d be laughing. I probably will after I dump his narcissistic ass.
I go and eat at McDonalds to keep myself humble. I hate foodies.