Search confessions

Sad trade off

It’s great that he gave up drinking if it was creating a problem in his life. It’s sad that the only time he could ever say the things that I needed to hear from him was when he was drinking. I think if you can only express your true feelings when you’re drunk, alcohol is only a symptom of a much bigger problem.

Lovely! Judgemental Me!

I haven’t liked this word “ lovely “ for awhile now and today I have to tell the public. I noticed whenever people say “ she’s lovely “, or “ It’s a lovely present “, “ it was lovely to meet them “, they all don’t have anything nice to say, but they still have to be polite, so they use the word lovely. I find it so fake when they say it too. I like analyzing body language and words people use, what they say how they say something, so that’s what I noticed. Ever since I realized this, I caught myself wanting to use this “ lovely “ to describe someone or something too. Just a couple of times because I really didn’t know what to say. I chose not to comment. I caught myself not to do it, because at that moment I just confirmed so it is true, when you can’t describe someone/ something is nice, we just turn to the word “ lovely”. Another word is “ yes”. Someone that keeps saying “yes”, it sounds patronizing. They are usually people that are proper, want to let people know they are educated and a good person. They just keep answering “ yes “. Hey, what do you readers think? Any thoughts are welcome. I’m sure I will get some disagreements. I let you know, I haven’t used the word “ lovely “ once in my life to describe anything or anyone. But I have said “ yes , yes, yes” to a few people, and in my heart I was doing my eye rolling. Ya, I don’t eye roll when I’m in conversation. I also think that’s a sign. It says a lot about how they feel about the other person. Haha

Maslow’s Hierarchy

Hate to say this but when you’re burning through your savings just to survive living in Vancouver, I honestly don’t have any energy to care about world wars, conflicts, “He said/she said” drama, or 40 year businesses shutting down. Survival of me and wondering wtf will happen to me before philanthropy and politics.

Unpopular, controversial opinion

A lot of these ageing rockers just don’t sound as good as they used to. A bunch of balding, out of tune, out of shape, overweight middle-aged men that sound either too drunk or stoned to sing, behaving like they’re in their early 20s all over again. And whenever they perform new material, most people sit down. People pay these guys to hear songs that they know, not the crap off some new album. Most ageing rock bands reunite after being split up for so long pretty much for the money. As a radio DJ in my generation once said, “I’d like to thank John, Paul, George and Ringo for not getting back together and spoiling a great thing.”

The Drifter

Ever since The Railway Club closed I feel like I have been drifting around looking for somewhere to belong.

Ob La Di, ob la da, life goes on

I recently ran into someone from high school. I wouldn't call this person a fully-fledged bully. That person was just a colossal jerk to me. We both talked for a while and had no hard feelings about the past. He never apologized, but really it didn't matter. We both moved on. I respect people who move on from high school much more than those still stuck in high school 20 years later.

Do better or do worse?

Something we notice on social media is basically a trend of all kinds of phrases. Among the many phrases you hear are “ghosting”, “bae” “wokeness” “narcissist” and now “do better.” I wonder if I’m the only one who thinks that “do better” is merely a disguised insult that comes off as virtue signalling? I find that whenever people use this phrase, they don’t actually encourage positive behavior. It comes off as attacking and demeaning, which basically makes the other person feel ambushed. Maybe I’m the one who needs to “do better”. Do better? Do worse? What next? Do nothing? Nothing at all? JUST DO IT!!

Is this Bullying?

Years ago, I had a supervisor at work who made my life hell. He eventually quit, but I dealt with him for years and continue to grapple with the trauma. I randomly experience feelings of rage bubble up because of all the times I had to bite my lip and suppress my anger when he provoked me. He'd been demoted from a previous position and was constantly terrified of getting fired. To save his job, he wanted me to perform as if I were superhuman or a machine. He followed me around all day and constantly breathed down my neck to work faster and complete more tasks. Unfortunately, quitting was not an option. The company has a carefully worded anti-bullying policy. Basically, managers can't use slurs, violence or any *obvious* forms of bullying. "Ensuring accountability" or “motivating” employees they'd say, is not bullying. The insidious thing about my supervisor was that he figured out how to bully people in a way that didn't appear to violate the policy. He repeatedly used tone and body language by speaking to me like an angry, belligerent drill Sergeant. He'd slam things and take “digs” at me that were insulting but without slurs. He’d gaslight me by telling me to do something while I was already doing it as if that would make me do it faster. On top of the constant nagging, needling and pressure to do more, he'd constantly criticize and complain about every little thing while making me take responsibility for his mistakes. I often started my day listening to a list of complaints and then working without any breaks all day to finish everything so that I wouldn’t get berated. One day, he was speaking to me in such an indescribably rude and demeaning manner that I finally lost it and cussed him out. The senior managers suspended me. I didn't bother to explain the pattern of bullying because I thought their reaction would be, "wait, so he's been driving you as hard as possible on behalf of the company? Haha, that's awesome, keep it up!” I’m still haunted over whether I should've spoken up or not. At the time, I thought that his behavior would be considered laudable, so I quietly accepted my suspension. So tell me, should I have reported him? Is the behavior I’m describing bullying or was I just an unlucky worker with a demanding boss?


I’m glad they didn’t win the cup this year. I used to wish they would win it before my dad died, but winning it the 1st year after would have been adding insult to injury.

Omg he needs to get over it

I have a friend in his 40's who's on FetLife & constantly complains how hard it is to meet women to have as he calls "dirty kinky fetish type sex" ....I have told him it's very likely people who are in that "scene" maybe make up I would say 5 or 6 or 7% percent of the general population here on Vancouver & people in general aren't into that type of sex, only the plain vanilla type sex, but it goes in one ear out the other, I think I should tell him to complain to someone else as it annoying & I've only listened to him about it because I'm a friend of his lol


ART CARS, but no cars

When looking at a street installation, you asked my opinion. We chatted briefly, before we...

More on