Search confessions

Outward bound

Vancouver offers nothing right now: no concerts, no live performing arts, no movies, no community centres, and I definitely don’t want to be in any Skytrain car, club, bar, restaurant or at any beach right now. So every weekend I’ve been going to the suburbs and farmlands, and have been enjoying my time there with lots of space and no worries. I can see myself making a permanent move out especially since WFH is possible. My head feels clear and calm out in the valley.

Capitalism is killing us

It confounds me that during a global pandemic, during the greatest civil rights movement in history, life is still driven by the great capitalistic machine. We need a revolution people! For those of us who lost our jobs during the pandemic, life has become a stressful CERB hustle (if you are lucky enough to get CERB) to somehow survive on just under $2,000 per month (less if someone is on disability assistance or income assistance) in cities like Vancouver where you would be lucky if $2k can cover your expenses AND still get to eat, let alone incur all of the costs associated with the pandemic (cleaning supplies, masks, added time to run errands and be cautious). If you are lucky enough to still have a job, you have to carry on as though nothing is happening - still produce, produce, produce. The reopening efforts are not because we miss social connection - we have all found creative ways to try to connect socially throughout the pandemic (though it has been hard) but all of the reopening restrictions relate to businesses, and only slight changes have been made to the limits on our social interaction (or our "bubbles"). The driving factors for reopening are economic - so we are literally juggling life and death to ensure our precious economy is saved, yet now would be the perfect time to implement a guaranteed annual income supplement, cap housing prices, make post-secondary free so individuals who have been laid off can upskill! The more I think about it, the more I realize our entire population is risking life and death to protect the wealth of a handful of capitalists who own basically everything. We need a revolution! We were working at breakneck speeds before, but now it is almost Orwellian to have to carry on as a cog in the machine while people are dying around us and systems are broken, yet we must putter along as though it is the new normal.

Borrowing Stress

It's the one habit during all this I need to kick. I'm not a business owner in debt. I'm not a health care worker burning out. I'm not in a relationship that's been trapped with isolation issues. What happens in America has no relevance to me as I live in a place with Doctor Bonny leading us. I like the cool summer weather as it helps me sleep. I spend money locally. My life is good and positive. But I daily look to things other people stress about and borrow their stress for some reason

Time Again

Where I need to climb mountains with The Dark Crystal overture playing in my ear buds, with not a human in sight, just mountain meadows under the sun, bees buzzing from one flower to the next, and friendly little birds eyeing me curiously.

Wear a mask!

Watching the rising COVID numbers in the States while people here act like we beat COVID by refusing to wear masks in stores, transit and any indoor public space. Keep walking by downtown barbershops where people getting their haircut aren't wearing a mask. Keep seeing ig stories of locals partying at bars drunkely rolling around each other. You are selfish if you don't wear a mask on public transit and if you go party at bars and are all over people. Don't ruin the reopening of the province by being a selfish fool.


I’m just getting so fucking tired. Of all of this.

Definite social isolation

I really appreciate those who’ve shared similar posts here. The pandemic has driven home that I actually have no friends. I know everyone is doing their best and hunkered down looking after themselves. I guess it’s been a bit of slowly dawning sad realization. Not throwing a pity party. The phrase I’ve heard so often ‘in the end all you have is yourself’ is just so accurate.

Still its you in my heart

I still remember that rainy morning, when i woke up only to find out the reason which eventually ended up my relationship with her. I spend the 24 hrs in isolation at hospital and seeing me in misery she came back to me. It still didn’t worked and everything was destroyed but on diwali night when i came to her she was with that same men. I still did what ever she asked for, meetups, trips, calls. We don’t talk to each other now. But i don’ think that i could just move on. I still love her and thats what I promised her once. WE SAY TIME HEALS BUT REALITY IS THAT THE FACTS REMAIN SAME WITH A PLACE LEFT EMPTY IN OUR HEARTS and me writing my confession tells it all.

Sick of construction

For the last 2 years, the office building I work in has been sandwiched between construction sites, including construction that directly affects my building. The noise has been constant (my work issued us crapping noise-reduction headphones) and there were new sidewalk and road closures almost daily. Now working from home, I have to deal with more construction. Firstly, the water pipes in my condo building were replaced over the course of five months. Another building two down from my residence has on-again, off-again construction for the past four years. They managed to start the main project of adding two new stories which involves riveting many, many steel beams. All of this noise is on top of the garbage trucks that seem to mostly run between 10pm to midnight and 5am to 10am every day and the local unhinged population who seem to need to yell at everyone and everything. I am so sick of noise. I just need it to go away.


I’m friends with a vast number of people. And I discovered that these people are all linked on social media, and they completely talk shit about each other behind their backs! Just because you “follow” or are “friends” with someone does not mean a thing. A male was ridiculing a video posted by a female to me. Another female was sending screenshots of another female’s posts and laughing at them. I absolutely do not trust these people. They might “like” what I post but the chances are high that they’re laughing at me too. There is so much jealousy too. If I post something, people will try and bring the attention back to themselves on an unrelated matter. Such a quagmire, this social media thing. It’s probably one of the most constraining things out there.


That smile, though.....

You are tall, dark, gorgeous, and French (?), with a killer smile, and you frequently offer to...


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