I suggested abortion to a close friend and she went through with it. Even though she has a lovely family with children now, and even if my words weren't the ones which made her decide. I still feel responsible, and it has haunted me for decades.
I was being bullied at work, by my manager. After two years of therapy, I no longer put up with people trying to manipulate me or wanting to dump all their problems on me. However, this has caused no end of trouble with my family and friends, who preferred the old me. Oh, and I lost my job. Maybe I should just go back to being a butt-kissing hypocrite. All I want is a quiet life, and that seems to be the way to get it.
Because I'm happily married. But i do self-discipline to look in the mirror and say to myself: "I See You." It's challenging at times but its a very needful ongoing self realization.
I miss cuddles. I don’t miss anything else really but the cuddles are what is seriously lacking. Hugs from friends and family just don’t cut it.
This COVID thing has really gotten to me lately. I’m grateful I still have a job but it’s stressful and I have no real break from it. After work I come straight home and do nothing but watch TV. I barely see the few friends I have anymore because of the restrictions. I’m also single for the foreseeable future because of COVID. I’m 29 (female) and I just can’t seem to find a light at the end of the tunnel anymore. I have no real joy or excitement in my life but I know I have so much to be grateful for - I have a job, I’m not struggling to pay rent, and don’t know of anyone (even a friend of a friend) who got COVID. I’ve never felt so low before and I’m really struggling to lift myself out of this.
I'm almost done writing my first book. It's been an inspiring time to say the least, in a bittersweet way. It'll be sad when it's finished, but I think it'll help people. It's a relief putting demons to bed.
... and 5 years ago he had an affair. I struggle to feel safe anymore. Any of you who are contemplating an affair, I want you to know the outcome for the mother of your children and the grandmother of your grandchildren.
My grandfather was a WW2 vet. He survived. His brother didn't. My parents raised 5 kids on a middle class income on an isolated island in eastern Canada, and managed to help us all get university educations. Before that, my ancestors walked out of Africa, settled Europe, crossed the Atlantic with nothing and settled virgin territory. Me? I barely scrape by with minimum wage jobs. I haven't built or created anything. I distract myself to death with mindless entertainment. I fee like I have failed thousands of generations, that all their struggles were for this? So I can live a mediocre life? Your hope in me was misplaced! I have failed you! Forgive me!
People say to be honest. To be with the person you love. Well how are you supposed to know what your feelings mean until it's all too late? Falling for someone while in a long distance relationship I thought I was just feeling lonely or horny. I thought the distance was making me feel so alone...and it was. So l stayed in the relationship and we stopped being long distance. But the feelings for the new person never faded and I think I made a really bad series of life choices.
Watched the mostly Vancouver-filmed 'Skyscraper' recently. My fave actor (no, not Dwayne) is in it, but also someone close to the love of my life worked on it.
There are 2 types of actors. One kind just plays themselves in different roles (ex: John Wayne, Mae West, etc), the other kind can actually act... and my fave actor is in the latter category.