Search confessions

Bad Move

I’ve never been on a date with someone I just met and thought is cute and have a crush on. I asked my crush out on a date recently. The answer was no. I even gifted a flower in Valentine’s Day. They expressed they weren’t interested. I feel stupid and I’m never doing that again. I can’t stop thinking about how stupid they must think I am even though they probably aren’t thinking about me at all. Ouch. I know I sound 12 but embarrassingly I’m pushing 40. I feel pathetic.

Eve of destruction

I've kept diaries for decades. Different ones from different time periods, and on different subjects. Lately I've been getting the urge to throw them out. Not entirely sure a sort of shedding of my past self, maybe? I think I will do it, but I worry I will regret it.

I am suspicious

of anyone who claim to be experts in any specific fields. Particularly if their expertise is mostly gained from youtube videos. Liking MMA does not make you an expert in combat. Reading about dieting doesnt make you healthy. Talking about fitness doesnt mean you are fit. LEss talk people. Much much less talk.

Unpopular opinion?

I was having a discussion with my gf about our potential future baby (I'm not pregnant). She mentioned that if I were to have a medical emergency during childbirth and had to choose between saving only the baby or only me, she would choose to save the baby. She didnt hesitate for a moment. This really upset me. Her reasons were that it has its whole life ahead of it and I've already lived 27 years. Am I silly to feel hurt?

Tangled Knots

I tied the knot with someone a few years ago, but the one I really want tied the knot with someone else.


I'm feeling frustrated with the lack of mental health services available for non-insured, low-income start-up business owners. I had to call 20 psychiatric offices today only to find out they don't take provincial msp coverage... maybe I'm wrong and I misunderstood. So then one place tells me to call Access and Accessibility Centre. Called them and apparently I'm in the catchment and they recommended Richmond Mental Health services which needs a referral. Why is it sooo difficult to get help? The silver lining? I'm not suicidal...but if I was I definitely wouldn't go through all this effort to get my mental health taken care. I'm sick of barely having enough food, living one month to another wondering if I'll make enough sales while everyone around me wants a deal. On top of that, I don't have the fuckin time to apply for CEBA, CERS or any grant. How does the government expect sole proprietors to do all that plus run a business on your own. Hopefully my family survives. I just wish I could crawl under my blanket and cry for days.

One Dose Now for Everyone Most Likely to Die

I hate the NDP AFTER 40 YEARS. I’m 65 and under doctor’s orders been in ISOLATION with my wife with numerous chronic conditions. My health is manageable (diabetic) but the virus will kill me. My neighbours won’t wear a mask. In isolation for over a year now told to go to the end of the line (April). I will vote Adrian Dix out of office. My wife can’t work because she could bring the virus home. 500,000 diabetics in B.C. The government has let us down.

I want to kill myself

Hello. I have been struggling with depression for a long time now. I’ve dropped out from college twice this year and I feel like an absolute failure. The thing that pushed me over was having my last miscarriage as I found out I cannot have my own children. I just don’t want to exist anymore. It’s very hard to find help in my city as no one is taking patients. And online therapy I do not have the money for. I feel so hopeless that I’m started to neglect my dog. It makes me feel so horrible I can do this to him. I know that this is basically a rant but I do not have anyone else to talk to because my husband works to make money and I don’t want to make him worried about me. Thank you kind strangers I appreciate you for listening.

My fantasy is messed up

When I lay down for bed I secretly wish a women even an ugly one would sneak in my room and wake me up by lifting her dress and sitting on my face. I'll never have this happen but it keeps running through my mind. I should get help but it's embarrassing to talk about.

Come down

I decided to stop taking anti-depressants for good. I’m sure they definitely work for other people who really need them, but I realize that they’re not for me. When I first started going through withdrawal, I thought that I was on the verge of having a stroke. I haven’t taken any anti-psychotic drugs for a week now but it’s still in my system. Not sure how long it will take, but I hope to get back on track soon.


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Savage Love: Antidepressants put the boots to reader’s kinks

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