Search confessions

Hey drivers!

Slow down. Just because there is no traffic doesn't mean that the streets have suddenly become the Indy 500. Now is not the time to get into a crash. It would likely be very inconvenient for you and the guy you smash into. You might be stuck without your vehicle and find yourself taking the bus. Think about it. Speeders are just a bunch of douchebags at the best of times. Especially now.

Boozy Floozy

I’ve been getting wasted every other night and laughing my ass off so much that my abs actually feel like I worked out. At least I don’t have to go to the gym! I crack myself up... lol. ALOL. That means: Actual Laughing Out Loud. Ok, I’m still drunk.


I seriously need to work on my attention span. I can’t even watch a movie yet I can binge watch short videos on YouTube all day. It’s ridiculous. If they’re longer than 10 minutes I don’t click. Time to put the phone away and read a book. I wonder how long it’ll take me to rewire my brain.

What i'm thankful for

I don't yet personally know anyone that has this virus. I live alone. No more roommates (thank the sky friends). I fixed that old espresso machine earlier this year. I have enough to pay my rent. I have food and can get food. I turn on my tap and there's clean water. I take a shit in a washroom, alone, usually on the internet. I have the internet. The fact that i'm canadian and live in a country that will not be completely devastated by this virus. Board games with solitaire option. My plants. Music! Everyone reading this from their homes where they should be and where they should stay.


I've had two pending surgeries put on hold indefinitely - one for my heart and one for a benign (90% chance, not confirmed) tumour in a tricky spot. The heart situation was a long time coming but they didn't want to operate until it was absolutely necessary, despite the decline in my quality of life. Now, I don't know when either surgery will take place and I'm scared that my heart's going to give out before the COVID situation eases up and the hospitals start re-scheduling surgeries. It's not their fault, I'm not blaming the hospitals or my surgeons at all - they're doing their best in an impossible situation and I'm so grateful for their dedication. I'm just reeling from all the anxiety; trying to keep it together for my family is taking most of my energy.

No fun Bobby

Not his real name....but the scenario is the same. He used to drink. Sometimes a bit too much, but mostly it was ok. Then he completely stopped. He became so incredibly boring and judgmental. (Nothing worse than a reformed drinker or smoker) . The only time that he showed any kind of love and affection was when he was loosened up by alcohol. It was so nice to hear him say that he loved me! It’s awful when you really wish that the person that you love would drink more. .

The hardest thing

When you finally meet someone that seems to completely “get” you, but then they turn out to be a selfish jerk! I wish I could just accept it and move on, but it’s so hard to ignore all the great stuff. For my whole life I’ve wished to find someone who sees the natural world like I do. I finally found him, but he also happened to be completely self-absorbed, lacked empathy, and truly believed he is “god’s gift” to women. (Yes he actually said that.) it’s so incredibly hard to turn my back on all of that just to save myself from being completely taken advantage of. Sometimes love really does suck!

Just a thought...

I find it particularly amusing that people are already going stir crazy from having to stay at home in light of the current situation we're all facing. There's still family you can talk to, internet to browse, etc. Having spent years working at sea for months at a time, I find it funny how people cant handle the isolation. Imagine : no phone, internet access and limited to nil mail service, seeing the same 20 faces each day. Some perspective for you snowflakes.

Pot in the apocalypse

Me: *clears throat* Everyone: *freaks out* Chill people. Not everyone coughing is sick. I’m just a stoner clearing my throat. Be safe :)

Radio Silence

At a time like this, I would have thought that my friends and acquaintances would check in more or at least reply to my text messages and emails. That hasn't been the case at all. There's no way they're super busy right now. So they're either not doing well enough to reach out/reply, or they don't care about me. Or maybe they just don't like me at all. In an already scary and saddening situation, all of those scenarios are making me want to crawl into a hole. I feel alone and worried — for everyone and for myself.


Hey, my eyes are down

I’ve seen you, and I feel you’ve seen me.. ...

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