Search confessions

I'm "lonely" by geography and age

As a single man approaching age 40, I've been living in Vancouver for about 11 years now. One thing that throws off my vibe when it comes to dating is the perception that I might be lonely and desperate. Women may think I'm lonely because I am often trying to find dates for concerts, beach days and so on... Often on short notice. These women may wonder "Doesn't this guy have friends? Why does he have so much free time?" Here's why: (1) My best friend moved to the USA 3 years ago (2) Two other best friends live in Nanaimo, one is a super busy hard working Dad, the other is also very busy (3) another best friend lives in Prague. I have 4 best friends, and consider myself extremely lucky, as most people just have 1 or 2. (4) In total, I count 13 close friends that I love dearly... and you know what... NONE of them live here. Hence the free time. As I approach 40 as well I notice that many of my friends with kids are essentially handcuffed to their toddlers and babies for the next several years, with little to no free time to ever cut loose and have a fun night out in Vancouver. I can think of three of them now who privately express to me their occasional feelings of discontent about being trapped in this phase of life. So am I lonely and desperate? I guess so, but it's just circumstances, bad luck and growing older. THIRTEEN good friends... I fantasize what life would be like if we all lived in the same city: a reciprocal community constantly creating group social events for each other. I'd be a much more shining, happy and fulfilled person, and that would reflect better in my psyche and dating vibes. My life would be so much more rich, full, and positive, with this crew of beloved friends around. But alas, I am essentially alone, and that's not a sexy vibe. It makes dating SO much harder. I know I'm not alone in feeling like this in a city full of immigrants. People that grew up here and have forged a lifelong community around them are incredibly lucky.

Don't take it

My confession is a warning. When you leave something at a store to get a service, but it's damaged instead and offered no charge, don't take it. Not getting charged for your thing FU is no compensation. I've asked my boss how is that a compensation. He said well, we just won't charge for it. see where it goes. Don't take it,. don't get ugly with the front line workers either, get to the boss who thinks it'll never touch them.

Feeling down today

I am a goblin. Sad to say but true. I am a goblin. Nobody would ever want a goblin.


I'm on my own this year and am surprised at the amount of people ("friends?") who do not reach out to include me at their table. Isn't that the spirit of this holiday? I would bring food and help clean up if that were the issue, but it'd be nice to know people generous enough to include others during the holidays...


I got into a horrible explosive argument with someone from my past. We both parted on bad terms. Then I found out years later that this person passed away. I wasn't sure how to react. I'm sorry about that now. It's too late for me. The best advice I have for people out there is this. Talk it out and try to come to an understanding, even if you don't really like each other. Life is very short.

I cringe

every time I see grown adults tell fart jokes out loud in public. How old are you people??? Fart jokes are the lowest form of comedy. In fact, they're not funny at all. It's more about shock value. and they belong in kindergarten. Have some self respect and grow up.

Dear Mangers

Okay. You probably think I'm annoying. You probably think I'm crazy. Let me be blunt. If you do not want to hear anymore complaints, then do better. You need to do a better job at training your staff so that way they'll know how to talk to customers. If your staff are having an "off day", then send them home. Don't come into work. And by the way, don't ever call me a "Karen." Drop the whole "Karen" moniker already. It's getting old and juvenile. Either call someone by their real name or use your own name instead.


Taking time away. I imagine it’s like going on a cleanse from my environment and the things in my daily life. How does it feel thinking about coming back? And where would I rather be?

it turned me into an emotionless psychopath

We worked in same dept and I fell in love with him. He said no thanks and I moved on. It down-spiraled into evil when a jealous old man supervisor sexually harassed me to push me out. the company did nothing and it was swept under the rug. When I lawyered up I was retaliated against. The ripple effect was horrible and non-stop, my 15 year old daughter was driven out of my home because I couldn't deal and took it out on her. I relapsed. I'm suicidal and confrontational. I'm a single mum and sole provider for two teens, no support from their father or the Gov. I broke my hands working for less than industry standard and was close to bankruptcy. The sexual harassment I can deal with, that old man is a joke and everyone knows it. The stress trauma on my kids, we can deal with, we love each other and don't fuss, but, I fear my daughter is gone for good and that really kills me, that she can't get past my negative environment at the time, she can't forgive me for a temporary lapse of calm gentle mum while I was processing the comapny's denial of sexual harassment by a supervisor. The worst part for me was when my old crush from work ghosted me. The man led me on and on and on. I confess, I loved working with him. I didn't need to be fake, I didn't need to talk, everything came natural. Even when he told me no, it was cool. I'm a big girl, I can handle rejection. But what's with the ghosting? Changed his number, didn't answer work emails, wouldn't talk to me when we crossed paths. I finally just started doing 180's and going another route if I would see him. When you are a man and you light up when a woman you like is around, give her closure when you decide she's not for you. Be a man and just tell her to move on, that you can't do it (with her!). People cry for real human experience and interactions, and then they ghost like it's something to do. Godammit, I will not let this clusterfuck experience turn me into an emotionless psychopath. I know I'm attractive and feel eyes on me all the time, I turn and look and behold! Another Mr. Right!


Prado Cafe on Commercial Drive

Your energy, warmth and presence as you left the cafe. ...

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