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Brightness

Got my booster today. It was encouraging and heartwarming to see fellow humans doing the same. One day.

I miss my childhood home

Near main and king edward. I lived there for nearly twenty years. It's like I live in a different reality now, so many homes later -- a much darker and more painful one. Every time I look at old pictures of the block, it instantly triggers those older, largely happier feelings and memories. Of a time when I was still capable of feeling okay, effortless and at ease. Those positive states weren't even the majority of my experiences there, but still the living memories remain. I don't want to regress back to that stage in life, but it's nostalgic.

Delivery drivers

are getting out of hand. The other day I refused to let in some parcel delivery guy to my building and he looked at me like I was Hitler. Just because you have a parcel or someone’s food does not mean I will throw open the doors, roll out the red carpet and bow to you as your enter my building. The rules about letting people in are SO FUCKING OBVIOUS guys. You don’t have special rights because you work for Amazon.

Life isn't fair

My ex left me in the middle of this pandemic, with no warning, and after I had been painfully laid off from my dream job. I put up with a ton of bullshit from them over the decades we were together, but never thought the relationship was worth ending. Since then, life has become worse and worse for me to the point of severe debt, health issues and major depression, while they are flourishing. I've just found out that they are engaged, and we have been apart for less than a year. Why is life so incredibly unfair? I never asked for this and my life has been hell. They made a choice, and their life has been roses and champagne. Fuck.

Farewell to Thee ECE

I worked as an Early Childhood Educator for a decade. It was good as a stepping stone, but not for the rest of my life. So I gave in my resignation and decided to move on after putting in ten years. The creative aspect like story time, arts & crafts, music and outdoor fun is what I miss the most about working in this field. On the other hand, I can do without the burnout of dealing with helicopter parents, toxic co-workers, diapers and out of control behaviors. And don't even get me started on these pathetic wages. Start paying staff what they're actually worth and maybe you won't have a hard time finding people. Then their morale won't be so low on the job. My health and wellness are worth far more than $16 per hour...no thank you. Sure, the $10 a day childcare plan sounds promising for parents, but what about the workers? I went on to another job where I get paid way more than that. I'm working full time, making more money and no longer stressed out as I was before. So Childcare, it's been real but I'm going to cut you loose. So long forever.

I wish

I was a hot girl. Then I could ditch my life and go live in another country without really working hard or doing anything besides taking pictures for IG.

I didn’t want to be right

For a long time I’ve been certain that my parent isn’t as wonderful as everyone else is convinced they are. They’re very, very manipulative and passive aggressive. But the rest of the family always assumed that I just had a problem with them and was judging them too harshly. I just have this ability to see people for who they really are, in spite of what they think they’re showing to the rest of us. But now they’re really old and their behaviour has finally become obvious to everyone because it’s gotten so bad. They’re totally self-absorbed, they lie, they throw tantrums when they don’t get what they want, and they have to be the centre of attention all the time. It’s become a huge problem and is causing no end of grief for the whole family. I get no satisfaction from being right, other than feeling a little bit validated, but I’d much rather have been wrong. They say that people with this type of temperament just get worse with age, and that’s definitely true in my parent’s case.

Unsure why things are going so well

Unfortunately, things can get better over time and life will improve. It keeps you motivated. Ugh. I just want to give up and become fat.

I’m no snitch

But I know more than a couple people claiming to have Covid to get off work. It’s a good idea. Maybe I should try.

I SAW YOU

Cute Guy at Vaccination Clinic

We were standing in line waiting to get our boosters and we talked about the book I was reading, ...

SAVAGE LOVE

Savage Love: Confusion over desire for spanking can be fixed with a proclamation of bisexuality...with limits

According to Dan Savage, it's better to give in to spanking than worry about your curiosity.

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