Search confessions


I'm a Vet, no the animal kind, the kind that has been places and seen things you should not see, so yes, I have the PTSD to go with the badge of being a Vet. I'm in the process of splitting with my wife who has had enough of my PTSD. Truth is, I can't really blame her. She doesn't know how to deal with someone who has PTSD, and that's not her fault. I have loved this woman with all my heart and everything I ever had. I always thought she and I would be on the porch in old age rocking in separate rocking chairs and still holding hands. I have put on a brave face in light of our splitting up our possessions now and boxing things up. The truth though is that I'm very afraid of myself after she has left. After she has left, I will have nothing -I have no children, no parents, no siblings, and she is taking the dog. I know that at best I will be living inside my car within a year, at worse, well, I dare not speak it. I fantasize about getting a truck and camper and traveling to see more of North America just to keep my mind off of my impending desperation and loneliness -but it's just a fantasy.

The answer you seek

For reals!? Come ON! It is so obvious. I mean, in your face 24/7 haunting your mind obvious. It's so right under your nose that even you can't fool yourself. You know the answer! You've always known! Now... go get him. You'll be so happy.

What has happened to this city?

Vacationed here with family for several weeks every year from 1988 - 2003. From Alberta originally. I left a sleepy, waterfront city with a rising food scene and plenty of great flea markets, bookstores, coffee shops and culture. Came back with my partner for a weeks' vacation this week for the first time in 14 years. Jesus Christ. Overdevelopment everywhere, towers on every block, expensive as fuck, no heart, no soul. And what the hell happened to all the local pubs? When - and why - did this city change like this?

No mention

I just went over the new BC budget. There is absolutely nothing in it that benefits me or acknowledges someone like me. I'm not married. I don't have children. I have a licence but don't own a car. I'm not a homeowner. I'm not a student. In other words, I'm a working, single adult who takes transit and rents. In the budget, I'm a nobody. Invisible. Zip. Nada. Zilch. No mention.

Remember that time

you were on an tropical island with your wife for your 10 year anniversary but you were texting me to say how bored you were and how lame she was being. Yah, you’re not a nice man.


I hate that I can’t stop thinking of you. You’re constantly on my mind. How can I get you out of my thoughts? We could never be together, but I see you everyday. I’ve known of you since summer but just got to know you recently. I wish I just ignored you instead of saying hello. For now I will try to avoid you, maybe if we were both single it would be a different story.

My head's swimming

I have no idea what the world is gonna throw at me next, but I gotta get outta here…but to where? To what? It’s like my heart and head don’t agree on anything and the more I try to take control the more I lose it. I mean, will anyone figure out how I could care less about my job anymore? Never mind that, what’s gonna happen when it becomes clear that I’ve long checked outta my life with Dr. Jekyll & Mrs. Hyde? That magic is gone and I gotta have a plan because i can just feel that it’s gonna get ugly when she realizes she does nothing for me anymore. Options options options….c’mon life, reveal something! Anything. Anything at all besides how I’m figuring out where my heart is really at, and it’s clear my heart is somewhere else. One thing's crystal clear: at least I like where it's lookin' and I wanna know more what that is.

Love Life at Work

So my superiors at workplace started dating recently. I get it when you first start dating, it is like the love of the century. But it really gets into my hair (probably everyone at work too) when they start sneaking their love life into the workplace. Awkward and annoying!

Tidying Up

I can't sympathize with couples in Marie Kondo's Tidying Up show. They made the decision to get a huge house, have 2-3 kids and get a LOT of stuff around and then they complain their house is too messy. And, of course, they always blame it on the house, as if the house is an entity that made decisions for them. Your life is overwhelming because you made it that way and your messy house is just a reflection of your poor decisions.

50 shades of grey

I confess this weather is killing me. I can't wake up in the mornings. I am a zombie at work. The endless grey skies and grey days just blend into a concrete coloured nightmare. I'll try and do a lunchtime workout and it temporarily lifts my energy. But then I slip into grey blahness on the commute home in my bulky coat and winter boots. Get me the eff to California, or Thailand or the Gold Coast. I look at swimsuit pictures, flower farm pictures, beach pictures and dream of colour and warmth again. Obviously I'm not a good Canadian. I don't even want to drink; I just want to shed my itchy bulky winter clothes and lie on a sun-warmed rock with lizards and listen to the wind rustle through the trees. This is probably the most grossest February ever.


Lookin' Back to See

Near West Broadway at Macdonald at mid-day Tuesday, you have straight, dark hair and fair skin,...

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