Search confessions

I’m kind of happy

about this situation. I’m embracing it. Lost my job but somehow I still keep finding ways to make enough money. Sleeping a lot. Hanging out with my parents, friends, etc. a lot. Usually I travel a lot and to be honest it was getting tiring. Now I have the excuse to stay and enjoy Vancouver for a couple years and not feel lazy or like I’m not doing enough with myself. It’s making me sort of....zen. I have no idea how I will proceed when the dust settles but it doesn’t really bother me like it normally would have. Maybe it’s all the sleep.

Distanced by water

I heard U2 ‘Never Tear Us Apart’ while driving to work for a very early morning shift.... this pandemic may be keeping me away from my partner, but it’s this same pandemic that has evolved our relationship to another level. I know he feels the same.

Liking it

I like how all the revolutions are happening in 2020. I guess people are pretty pissed off about covid.

Past the Threshold

I am now past that point in time where people my age update their social media profile pictures. Bad enough that I'm starting to feel old...but I can't even creep the hotties I used to know, either?


I think that Wish You Were Here is one of the most beautiful songs ever written.

Back in the old days

I was in a very abusive relationship when I was quite young. My first husband began beating me shortly after we got together. At that time in the 70’s we lived in a remote area. There was NO help for women like me, especially from the cops! Once he forced me out of our house late at night in sub-zero temperatures, without shoes or a coat. I had to hitch to the police, only to have them immediately call him to tell him to come and get me. Yeah. Things were terrible back then. Unfortunately, no one cared. My family sure didn’t. I was advised to “work it out” because that was my “duty”. Those days are long past, thankfully. He’s long dead, and I’m still here. I no longer believe that I’m obliged to tolerate abuse from anyone. At least that’s what I tell myself. It’s been a very hard road for me, because I didn’t know my own worth. As a child my father was very emotionally abusive to my mother and me, the only girl child. He was a complete misogynist. He believed that females only existed to fulfill whatever needs the males (including my brothers) had. He cheated on her constantly until he was too old to attract other women. He ignored me other than to let me know how awful I was and to complain that I wasn’t a proper female. I’m in my late 60’s now. I’ve raised my own kids and I’ve been married twice (I left the 1st one and the 2nd too) and now I’m divorced and live alone. I’ve spent my entire life fighting with myself for the confidence I need to succeed. To feel worthy of love, or even of being liked or respected. Every time I think that I’ve finally won that battle, something happens and I’m back to fighting the same old internal beliefs. Even my own children know how to beat me down, and they treat me like someone they don’t care about at all. I know that it’s me that I have to convince that I’m worthy of love and respect, but sometimes it feels like I’m always climbing the same mountain, and just when I think I’m at the top, I fall all the way back down and I have to start all over again. I’m really, really TIRED.

Cyclists versus the world!

It's so hard to be a cyclist in Vancouver. Drivers are terrible, there's dog walkers who don't give a fuck at all about their leashes or their dogs' behaviour, and it rains all the time. It is so muddy, dark, and slippery everywhere... but you know what? I love cycling. I am always going to fight you guys. We will win!

I changed my mind

At the beginning of covid, I use to think wearing masks was dumb. I hated it because breathing was difficult and ignorantly thought it was stupid. But now with covid still lingering and witnessing the statistics of covid, I realized people have loved ones who are susceptible to the covid virus. Its not a matter of protecting myself, its a matter of protecting other people. I realized I was just being selfish so I just sucked it up and just wore the darn mask . As a former non mask wearer I am starting to notice non mask wearers and realize how selfish and ignorant those people are. I hate wearing the mask but I became more mindful of others around me. I use to be anti mask but it feels good on the inside just to do my part. Now I think only selfish A-holes don't wear a mask.

Masky Smudge Face

I love wearing red lipstick but I can’t wear it with a mask on because it smudges all over the mask and my face. It’s annoying. I’m not a fan of the new lipsticks that don’t come off. I won’t complain too much though. I’d rather wear a nude lip than catch a deadly disease!!


I fixed your car

Kay - you're a welder. You were at my shop and we chatted about your dogs little short legs...


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