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Mental health

My job makes me want to kill myself. I get treated so poorly every day it makes me feel like garbage. So I'm finding work elsewhere that's not as stressful and quitting that shit hole. Here's to mental health.

Meeting blue collar guys in Van...?

Today I was walking down by the Port of Vancouver close to the seabus station, and I saw a few handsome, masculine looking, blue collar men just working on a Sunday. I even got checked out by one guy as I walked past... it was so nice, I miss this... living in metro Vancouver, I guess I just don't hang out in circles where I can meet these types of masculine, physical, hands-on type men... Where does a young-ish woman go to have the best chance of meeting a solid, sexy, respectful, hard-working blue collar guy? Are they all living in Burnaby, Coquitlam, Surrey, Maple Ridge or something? Do I need to get my single girlfriends together and take a trip out to these places on a Friday / Saturday night?! ;)

PTSD, not a love story.

I had extremely vivid nightmares that someone I cared about, and felt responsible for, had lost their own life over drug use. I had these for four months, and when I woke up, they were just fine, and they tried to show me they were fine. I never wanted that story so I tried re-writing my trauma into a story of love and friendship. Escapism. Twas a disaster, and I kept thinking my own salvation from the experience was to physically see them, like it would heal me. But lying has only let me to regret and confusion, and I could never be straight up with what I wanted or thought I needed from them. Turns out I just needed to realign fact and fiction and snap out of my nightmares being just that, and get help.


I'm in so much pain. How can someone just up and leave a person when things get rough? When they promised you everything? When they promised not to leave your side no matter what? When they said they understood and that they were all in? I don't know how to move on from this. I'm so broken. Trying to put on a good face but it's been a while and I'm still in hell.

Be Authentic People

I absolutely hate dating here. Its literally the same process week after week. Check messages on multiple dating sites arrange to have 1 to 3 dates a week. Have 1 or 2 dates flake out and have the other look nothing like their picture. Then meet up with friends to discuss what happened during the week. Sometimes the guy is decent and everything is going well until I realize his profile is a complete lie. It says he's a doctor but at dinner he's not a doctor but sells cars. I mean what else is he lying about? Also men wearing sports jerseys and sports hats to semi-formal restaurants is not acceptable. How hard is it to iron a shirt? A nice dress shirt with a belt and dress pants and dress shoes is all I ask. They don't have to be expensive but at least clean. You could work construction but there is a time and place for nice clothing. I really think gay men should dress straight men. You rarely see a gay man with poor fashion sense. They are well put together. I am 24 and think I am going to be single the rest of my life.

What if he loses?

I'm worried about the 2020 election in the states. I'm worried that Trump will loose. Now just pump the breaks before you fire off, let me explain myself. First off, Fuck Trump. I don't like him and never have. But I'm worried that if he looses the next election he will scream "Coup!" or "Rigged!" and keep on screaming it until the cows come home. His base are a bunch of right wing, conspiracy thinkers, all armed to the teeth. What if they believe him and decide to "Take their country back"? You might think I'm looking too far ahead, but I read the comments on Breitbart and Fox News. A lot of his supporters believe that there is a coup going on right now and they are loosing their country. Trump loosing will throw gas all over that fire.


Sorry Kendrick, but I have to say that I don't agree. You invited that fan up on stage and picked the song she was going to sing. You then told her to sing the song that you wrote, only to stop when she hit the N bomb. Here is the thing, I don't agree that you should have that word in your songs, it offends me greatly. But if you're going to put that in and pick out people to sing it, then maybe don't pick out the white people. Or choose a song that doesn't have a racial slur in it.

There may come a day

When youth will fade away What will they say about me? I'm a saggy old runt Who'd rather swing away than bunt

I’m from soviet Russia

... and things are sort of getting planned economy over here. If you’re wondering why you cannot afford a place to live, it is because your government is spendings it’s money planning around it’s immigration ideals instead of allowing a traditional housing economy to flourish.

Strange dream

I had a very weird dream one time. The swimming pool was purple. The chlorine was purple. And some purple acoustic guitars floated across the pool. Then there were some lavender coloured waterfalls and green weeping willow trees drooping down in the water. That was so weird but beautiful.

Go out & enjoy the nice weather

My family tells me......well ya & do what? i have no freinds I find it hard to meet people even though I go out & try to mingle (& by the way I don't do it in a creepy way) I'm on government disability middle aged, & ya I get it, my siblings all got families spouses & children, so as the old saying goes "easier said than done".......I'm basically at the end of my rope

I met my true love too young too!

The songbirds happily chirping away at sunrise always remind me of him I am full of regret I will never forget The feel of his fingers The weight of his kiss Making him smile & blush The sound of his laughter The twinkle in his mesmerizing eyes in candlelight I shouldn’t have been in such a rush You moved on, yet I still feel this connection Maybe I need to take a lovely stroll into the sanatarium.. I mean resort spa.

So, here's my unwanted opinion...

On abortion no less. If this is a touchy topic for you, please scroll past. I understand people have their reasons, and I do not discriminate against those who have chosen to have an abortion. However, part of me is also left wondering, what is so wrong with our society? Our healthcare system provides free, safe, abortions to basically anyone who asks. I fully understand that there are circumstances where this route is perhaps the best for the mother and child. However, I really have a hard time with is how some people choose this option because they were not using a form of contraception, or they had been, and it failed, ending inunintentional pregnancy. The same healthcare system that will provide abortions, also provides birth control of many forms, for very little or no cost (though I am well aware some can be rather expensive). I feel like abortions should be a last effort, not the first thing that comes to mind when people panic because they did not mean to become pregnant. Anyone who has intercourse of a certain age, has to know that if you have sex, you can become pregnant. It bothers me how many thousands of dollars it costs a family who is more than ready to have children - but cannot due to infertility issues etc - to adopt a child out of the system. When people don't even think twice about going for an abortion, because after all, it "wasn't really a human being", and "they couldn't afford a child right now anyways" On that note. People who claim that a collection of growing cells is "not yet a person" are not entirely wrong, but they're not right either. If a chicken has a clutch of eggs, and they are fertilized, those eggs are "baby chicken's" But if a human carries a fertilized egg, it's not a human until it has a heartbeat? To me this does not make much sense at all. Those growing cells will become a human if allowed.. Why is it that our society runs in this fashion? I am well aware of overpopulation problems. But who is going to help bring new ideas and new solutions to the table to help us with our global crisis? Believe it or not, the answer is people.

It’s always you

I met my twin flame when I was young, stupid, & terrified of my future due to health reasons. I pushed then away. I will never regret the time spent with them. They made me see myself clearly and the person I wanted to be, but I had too much fear and too much pride to tell them my true feelings as well as why I ran. I’m sorry I wasn’t strong or bold enough for you. I wish nothing but the best for you and yours. I am sorry we can not remain friends. I still have these large terrifying feelings for you. I will never forget you because a piece of you always seems haunt me.

Bad luck? Cursed?

I've experienced significant hardship and adversity in my life since I was a child. I have experienced all types of abuse, became afflicted and diagnosed with multiple health issues, doctors make serious medical errors that ended up in me getting quite sick, also mysterious symptoms doctors can't figure out, treated horribly by people I gave everything to, bullied since I was a child into adulthood and at work, struggle financially cause of health problems, lack support, molested and other bad experiences dating so given up on that as I'm choosing to be alone to not get hurt even though it's lonely and difficult, and seemed to keep getting knocked down by something horrible with health, financially, and personally. Even had friends comment on I don't know how you are so strong, or why it seems like I have such bad luck. I'm so broken by life, and all of these issues plus depression and ptsd, financial difficulties, bullies has me wishing for the pain and hardship to stop and wishing I were dead (seeing a counselor, have for years, and treatment resistant depression) and seeing young people with everything to live for having their lives cut short. It isn't right. I've seriously look into euthanasia in Europe as it is legal there and been granted to people with depression and other health issues. It's a contentious issue as how does one measure suffering. I'm 41 and have exhausted treatment options, and managing the chronic issues, and unexplained symptoms for years. I hoped eventually things could maybe improve, but life has shown me otherwise. I read this article recently about a women over 100 that said she had not once experienced happiness or joy in her life, and was not only saddened but heartbroken for her.... Why is life so cruel to so many good people?


Brittany - you were studying for your real...

You were 'trying' to study for your upcoming exam at Platform 7 in Kits. We chatted for...


Savage Love: How to be a good orgy host

Hosting a sex party doesn’t give someone the right to insert himself into someone else’s scene.