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To say goodbye to this chapter in my life. Its been a long time coming, with many self realizations, true revelations and some reality checks, also the knowledge to move forward with your own goals and dreams. Hopefully ! Closure is a bit sad but its also a time for renewal. It is never really closed when it comes to family. Because you always love them, but you love yourself too. Peace See Ya Around?

Missing

I miss Vancouver but I'd need to clear 1500$ a week to make a go of things. It's getting like that right across the country. We should build another city in Camada and call it Paradise. A refuge for people who can't afford other cities. Rent would be 500 a month for a 1 bedroom apt.

Bleaker than I thought...

Or, this is why I don't do Toastmasters. The Walter White of this timeline enjoys my sort of humor. Acid black. An impounded block of fentanyl, etched with a Calavera (sugar skull) design. "Sugar, how you get so fly?" Dia De Los Muertos, indeed. A very, very geeky joke. My hat's off to the crazy bastard who thought of that... Thank you for the laugh. Much needed. This ugly gilded age has been getting me down. The Roaring Twenties redux - in a hundred years, we've learned nothing about how to be a better species. The Great Gatsby on Instagram. Technological ostentatious douchebaggery is not better than vintage ostentatious douchebaggery. Just more painful.

Have you ever?

Have you ever had a terrible fight with your SO that just escalated so quickly and got so out of hand, that before you know it you’re basically breaking up? That happened to me yesterday. I feel a bit shell-shocked now. Its not what I intended but I’d been feeling more and more annoyed by a number of small things, that all it took was that one last one insensitive remark and I lost it. Then his reaction when I told him how mad I was, got even more ignorant, with him refusing to respect my boundaries or take any responsibility for what was wrong. It just got worse and worse and now he’s gone. I feel like this was inevitable and I know that I wasn’t being unreasonable about the issues that were getting to me, but I still feel completely unprepared for what took place and now I’m walking around in a daze.

Children grown and

I feel alone. and tonight for the first time in my life I am scared of being alone.

In essence

It's been so long since I held a woman in a warm loving embrace, right after staring her into her beautiful face. It's been so long since I lay next to a woman, holding her just enough to let her know she is safely cared for, with my nose nestled in her hair just enough to smell her favorite shampoo and her actual essence mixed together. It has been never since I made love to the woman I'm in love with. In essence her smile bewitched me, her beautiful brown eyes grabbed me tightly, her fiery heart both gave mine life and sucked it out and she is perfection mixed in with all kinds of doubt. She is an angelic angel no doubt! So in essence, I will live life without!

Do you have any gum?

If I surreptitiously take out a package of gum and I don't offer you a piece, it's only because I'm not sure how long the gum packet has been in my purse. I would offer you gum if I knew it was fresh. Or at least bought this year.

Impossible situation

I have been trying so hard to change things I know that need to be changed. But alas I feel there are forces working against me and im not sure why. No matter. I will prevail. Room or no room. Help or no help. Maybe this is just not the city for me. Ive been trying for a while to get free. Guess I will take that road less traveled again, see where it goes this time. Dead end road here, apparently. Goodbye I will miss the mountains and the u I never got to know. Shame about that, real shame.

Unrequited Love Sex

Does it happen?? Can someone be obsessed with someone long enough or intense enough that the other person is just like "ok, whatever, let's do this"? 'Cause trying to critically examine my life choices I'm pretty sure that's what I'm banking on.

Undecided

8 almost 9 days since I shaved my face I've never grown anything longer than a 2 week beard Maybe I will shatter that record this winter Maybe I wont *Shrugs*

I SAW YOU

Strangers on a train

Dear Chad (NoLastName, but your mom’s name is Simone). We met during a train delay from Seattle...

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