I have a really hard time trusting people now. I used to be so open and trusting that people were intrinsically good with good intentions, but that belief was smashed a few too many times. I recently tried hard to trust a person who had badly let me down in the past because of some things they said that made me think maybe they’d changed and there was hope. But I wasn’t ready to completely trust again because I was waiting for them to prove that they were being honest before I let my guard down completely. I’m so glad that I listened to my gut instinct this time before I got too comfortable with it, because they showed that they couldn’t be trusted just as I was afraid they would. I’m sad about this potential relationship being lost, but I’m equally sad about the complete loss of my ability to trust anyone. I don’t think I’ll ever get it back and that feels very lonely.
On the seawall today, nobody around and I start to hear this magical sound.
Came around the corner and off in the distance there's this guy passionately playing a piano and singing like he didn't give a shit about what anyone thought of him.
He was squirming around, missing notes, hollering while his voice was cracking.
It sounded good.
It was nice to see someone unself-conscious, it's been a long time since I've seen that.
It made me loosen up just the right amount.
Your cold sores are so sexy......sweet Jesus.
I’m 35 and recently have gotten into an open relationship with a woman 17 years older than me. She’s absolutely gorgeous and so sweet to me. She’s really helped me feel that there are some really amazing women out there after someone I was with a long long time was absolutely horrible to me all the time. Thank you universe for putting this absolute goddess of a woman in my life.
There is a serious lack of single quality men in the Lower Mainland. The good ones are either married or in relationships. I am left with a bunch of players who just sleep around 24/7. Where are the good looking men who can carry on a conversation? My last two dates went like this. Date #1 - Didn't even show up. I was at the restaurant and he ghosted me. Date #2 - He came drunk. The Manager of the restaurant called a cab to get me home.
Dating is impossible here.
same same same - start of summer, and I get the pang on loneliness like a stone in the heart . Isolation becomes so much sharper in the bright light.
But I muster up all the hope I can that I'm wrong.
I don't need this shit ever again.
I've been struggling so much lately. Mentally, physically (messed up ankle and foot) and financially. Nightmare neighbor's new girlfriend banging on the wall when my kid makes the slightest noise.. she's autistic and stims vocally often. I'm feeling uncomfortable in my own home all while just trying to make it through every month being a single mom, getting my daughter to therapy, going to food banks etc. and I've just hit my limit. Today the wheel on my child's stroller blew. The entire thing. Walking is our main way of getting around as I don't drive and get panic attacks on transit. I had to hobble on my bad ankle, while lifting the one side of the stroller nearly ten blocks to the gas station as at first I thought it only needed air. Once we got there and filled it with air, it immediately deflated. I felt so defeated. A man helped me figure out the issue which was the valve so I couldn't even just patch the wheel. I was kind of thinking out loud and said oh great, I can't afford that right now. He said sorry, can't help you there unfortunately. I was immediately embarrassed and apologized saying I wasn't hinting for him to give me money. I bought tape from the store to try and cover the valve after pumping more air in to try and at least get us home. As I looked up from the air pump he walked up to me and handed me $15.00 saying you need this more than I do. I immediately burst into tears and thanked him. I probably looked crazy. I was so overwhelmed not just over the money but mostly because of this man's kindness. I really, really needed that. I've been having such bad luck and crappy things in life lately that this man's one act of kindness alone made me sob. My faith in humanity was restored today. Another couple stopped to ask if we needed help as well. There are good people in the world. He will probably never know how deeply that touched me today. If you happen to ever read this, Thank you.. from the bottom of my heart. You completely made my day. I will pay it forward to someone else down on their luck someday.
I have a few friends and they're good people and I care about them, but I don't have a deep, genuine connection with anyone. It feels lonely.
The decisions you make on a daily bases could they change depending on what you decide to do, is it like fate or predestined to happen? If you only waited one more minute or if you changed the course you were on, decided not to make that stop. Would it it have changed the outcome? Or are the things that happen in your life simply fate and would they occur anyways no matter what choice you made at that moment ?
I ponder this today.