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Im just so busy !

I reached out to an old friend after thinking about her for years, ive never bonded with anyone like i have with her. I said how i felt .. I was sorry for being absent for years but i didnt want to burden my friends with my family drama of me raising a 14 year old sister addicted to drugs and with an eating disorder when i was 19 while they were all out banging boys and being normal young adults finding their way. She said she underatood and has always wanted to reconnect and that she missed me and thought of me often over the years. Ok good right ? Well... 4 rescheduled plans later i kept hearing oh you know i have 3 kids im So Busy! Hey i totally understand who wouldnt be ! Plans turned to oh ill call you.. And that never happened. Then i got some advice from my mom who said if she wanted to make the connection she would find a way to. Let it go. Dont hold onto outcomes. She isnt showing she cares by her actions. Boom. Blown away. I sent a message that read .."Hey, i know your totally busy and thats understandable lets try for a month away or so ok?" No response. Read message though. Is it so hard to say hey you know ive had second thoughts and a.b.c. etc. Or.. Just be honest !?! So easy to not be upfront and deal with life easier to be busyy. Who else has had this encounter? Do you just drop it or is this person actually busy and me having no kids just doesnt get it and thinks im being bluffed off ?

Chasing likes

I take a lot of photos ( landscapes etc ) and post them on Facebook. I confess I feel validated when there’s many likes and disappointed when there’s few likes. It’s so dumb

Trans girlfriend

I've been in a relationship with a trans woman for more than 2 years. She is beautiful, tall, very style-wise. She attracts a lot of attention. Every time we go out there's countless guys who gawk at her and just stare. Well let me tell you, you just look like foxes preying over meat and it disgusts me that you can never respect. Stop staring. Yeah she's beautiful but she's not an object. I don't know if you realize how stupid men look when staring at women. Plus, many of you are married guys, strolling with wife and kids, and still can't stop staring. Just FYI, yeah more men than you'd know are into trans women, but please stop, you look ridiculous.

deeply in love

I am not deeply in love with anyone. but at times when I hear this I feel it.

When I've spent too much time interacting with people

I go home and 'herminate'. I'll shower, burn candles, water my plants, turn on a fan, drink tea and watch anime. For some reason, I find relief not seeing human faces or hearing English. A lot of animes include rain; the pink noise is soothing. When I'm feeling slightly better I graduate myself to Korean tv. I find the culture and language endearing, comforting. Sometimes, I reacclimate to North American tv, but not often. I enjoy watching what's been filmed in Vancouver - must be the rain :)


I am finally reaching a place in life where I am unearthing the power inside of myself, rather than searching for it within what others think of me. I am almost embarrassed to say that it took years of hard work and honesty with myself to arrive at this state of mind. My biggest fear used to be rejection from friends for being too much or not enough. It became a self-fulfilling prophecy a lot of the time, as I would start behaving like an asshole and pushing people further away when I felt that they were moving forward with their lives without me. As they absolutely have the right to. Understanding that my power resides within means that I have the confidence to stand alone and feel proud of how far I’ve come and excited about working toward my goals, knowing that no matter what, I am there for me, that I can be a solid friend to those who choose to come along for the ride, and I can let go of those who wish to explore different paths.


Am discovering belatedly that life gets better when you learn how to prioritize.

What is a name

The more I hear about what type of person my great-grandma was, the more I wonder why I was named after her. She sounds very unpleasant.


West Coast Express Girl of my Dreams

To the Persian babe who sat across from me and slayed me with your hotness - wanna be friends?

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