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Bad year is an understatement

It's bad enough I lost my home, dreams, partner, savings, mental & physical health, friends, cat, vehicle, and livelihood (even got scammed for a grand on a lease) this year but now I have to kill the thing that I love the most in this world - my dog.

Midlife

I'm just a lumpy potato now.

Realized too late I was loved in return

And realized too late that a song for a certain person would be Someone Like You. (heard it twice, in 2 different stores, yesterday... and thought of him) Songs for Lost Loves~~

FML

Some people are skinny, and if they want to improve their physique they can lift weights. Some people are overweight, and they could focus on losing weight. Me? I am both skinny and fat at the same time! What the hell am I supposed to do? FML

Nice

I shrunk enough to fit back into my pants from two years ago.

I have a dirty secret.

I've been stealing the occasional rice crispy squares from my kids lunches for the past 4 years,and I've pitted them against each other in the blame game

Feet take over

Tastes change dramatically when you get older. I don't get turned on by a beautiful face or ass. I used to be a shapely breast enthusiast. Those thigs are interesting now, but don't instantly turn me on like feet. I want to talk to the woman with the sexy mules, showing her soles as she walks. I've become obsessed with athletic pantyhosed legs and sexy high heels. I even love the glorious clicking sound heels make when a beautiful woman strides down the street.

An old friend

that I reconnected with this past summer kept telling me that she wanted to set me up with her and her husband’s friend. I am not underage, but they are all a lot older than me, and it turned out that the ‘friend’ they wanted to set me up with is over 30 years older than me and is a very wealthy business man. I found this strange, as she knows that I have never been in an ‘arrangement’ like that before and that I don’t really date men that much older. But she kept trying to force this connection, even inviting him to a couple bbq’s with me there and when I first met him it is obvious that this person would not be my type and that we have nothing in common but he seemed attracted to me and kept trying to talk to me, almost as if she had already told him I was into him. Flash forward and now it has occurred to me that, since her husband works in finance, it is highly likely that they were trying to recruit this very wealthy elderly man as a client. What if I was part of the ‘deal’? It grossed me out to even think about being used like that, but I just have this feeling like she and her husband were maybe trying to pimp me out to get him on board. Now that I’ve totally nixed the idea I have not heard from her in weeks, where before she was constantly trying to set up get togethers. I even jokingly told her that there is no way I would want to have a sugar daddy relationship unless the dude was willing to pay me six figures cash upfront. She looked mad when I said that!! These are all high end people that I trusted and now I just feel Really icky. If my friend and I are correct, is what they tried to do illegal? Like, should I be thinking of reporting it?

The Roommate Tax

Living with roommates allows me to afford rent, but it has extra costs that I didn’t anticipate. The extra time spent cleaning, replenishing supplies, the strain of sharing a small space, and the stress of never truly being by myself. I wish I could afford to live alone but paying the roommate tax seems cheaper. Or perhaps it’s more expensive than I have the personal means for.

Back Stabber

A friend of mine cheated on his gf. The only reason I know is because the girl he cheated with is my roommate and I saw him leaving in the morning after what sounded like certain noises. He didn’t see me and she was still sleeping when he left so she doesn’t know I know either. I don’t know his gf. I’ve only met her once and she was really nice. It is so tempting to ask my roommate about it but it’s none of my business. We all hang out sometimes so it’s going to feel really awkward for me. Not sure how to play this one because I’m also disappointed in my roommate because we both agreed we liked the gf.

I SAW YOU

Dreamy eyes

you were a paramedic named Shane who attended too me when I had a medical emergency in July of...

EPITAPHS

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