I can't think of a reason to go outside. I wish there was something I wanted. Even someone. But I just draw a blank.
There are things to do right? People to love and be with.
I realize that my life has been centered around commercialism and I'm not sure what else there is.
I can take none of this with me in the end. But it helps ease the pain of living when I don't know how to let people in.
I mention something to others that has a negative impact for us but no one seems to want to listen to me. Weeks to months later another party in the group finally realizes what I tried to tell them and that person gets more attention about the subject than I did in the past. I don't understand. If you would have listened to me this would not have gone on any longer. Why do I get ignored?
It was years ago at a party a friend of a friend was telling me about these "bitcoins" and I thought it sounded pretty neat but I never did anything to follow up on it.
Boy did I ever miss the boat!
Being old and not much of a tech person, I didn't really understand what the deal was until I made the effort to jump through some of the hoops and get on the inside of this thing. I see it now! Amazing stuff, I feel like I dropped acid or something. Better late than never!
This is not financial advice & I am not a financial advisor...also I really have got no money anyway but from a mental health perspective I've found that learning about something that's a new thing for me has really turned my whole entire mindset around.
`pickles and cheese taste so goddam good togerther
Way back in the 80s, I met this guy who placed a personal ad in this paper. I mean this was way before the internet. He put his number in the ad to call. It started with 588 so I figured he lived close by. I called him because my best friend and my boyfriend were sleeping together and I felt alone. We connected and it wasn't love at first sight but we ended up together. He was kind and loving but I couldn't accept that and moved on. But we kept in touch for over thirty years but he never told his wife. My dad died in January and around the same time his wife found out we had always been in touch through a couple of postcards he still had. So all I feel is loss. I know it was all wrong but I miss him and I miss my dad and I have to figure out how to say good bye when I cant reach him anymore. So I put on Tori Amos and cried my eyes out and offered up this to the universe. This is where we met and this is where I can say good bye. I will always love you MIchawoo. See you on the other side...
I spend less time surfing the web than I did when I had a job..
When I was 9, my parents enrolled me in judo classes. I suppose it was a way to extract me from my shell (I was painfully shy and was having a difficult time making friends after a move). And I did enjoy it. After a few months, I went to my first tournament. My coach pulled me aside and asked me to throw my one and only match. Being an obedient child, I did. I didn't go back to judo after that.
I’ve never been on a date with someone I just met and thought is cute and have a crush on. I asked my crush out on a date recently. The answer was no. I even gifted a flower in Valentine’s Day. They expressed they weren’t interested. I feel stupid and I’m never doing that again. I can’t stop thinking about how stupid they must think I am even though they probably aren’t thinking about me at all. Ouch. I know I sound 12 but embarrassingly I’m pushing 40. I feel pathetic.
I've kept diaries for decades. Different ones from different time periods, and on different subjects. Lately I've been getting the urge to throw them out. Not entirely sure why...like a sort of shedding of my past self, maybe? I think I will do it, but I worry I will regret it.
of anyone who claim to be experts in any specific fields. Particularly if their expertise is mostly gained from youtube videos. Liking MMA does not make you an expert in combat. Reading about dieting doesnt make you healthy. Talking about fitness doesnt mean you are fit. LEss talk people. Much much less talk.